April 3, 2010

treasures of darkness

I will give you the treasures of darkness,
riches stored in secret places,
so that you may know that I am the LORD,
the God of Israel, who summons you by name.       Isaiah 45:3


What an emotional 48 hours I have had.  The Lord has been good to me.

My train trip from Kiev to Kharkiv was uneventful. I paid for a first class ticket (all of $50) and got a semi-private cabin--two little beds in a tiny room with a door that locked. My desire to be alone ended quickly when an older woman joined me. She came in and greeted me in Ukrainian. I told her, "English". She smiled, got on her bed, and went to sleep. That was that. I never slept a wink. My thoughts were consumed with what was to happen in just a few hours. I would finally meet my treasured daughters.

Upon arriving at the train station I hauled my [seriously heavy] suitcase and two carry-ons onto the platform. It was cold and rainy and I prayed like crazy that someone would, indeed, come and pick me up. After about five minutes a man came running up to me saying, "Uh-day?" Um, yes, something like that. I'm usually quick to set people straight when they say my name wrong (which is like, all the time). But this time I let it go, I figured they'll probably never get it right anyway. Besides, I had more important things on my mind.

My faciliator, Tatianna, is a nice lady. We have a little issue trying to understand each other. Her hubby Valentine is the driver. They take me to my apartment and tell me I have one hour to get ready.

They promptly reappear in an hour. We drive to the civil office to get the necessary paperwork we need to allow me to see the children.  It's a crazy situation, and I find myself in a place of having to, once again, dig deep in my faith. Everything seems to be going wrong. Tatianna is working hard to make things right so that I can go and see my children.

I remember a word the Lord gave my husband for me the day before, "You are NOT alone.  There are already an army of angels surrounding you."

I hang on to that word.

Eventually the whole mess gets taken care of, and we are finally on our way to the orphanage.  We drive along rural country roads, navigating potholes the size of moon craters along the way.  It reminds me of being in Africa. I sit in the backseat, fighting back the tears.  It is almost too much for me.  I long to have my husband here with me.  But he's not, and there's nothing I can do about it.  I refocus and picture the Lord sitting right next to me in the backseat of that car.

We arrive at the orphanage.  It is so far out in the country. It's a cold and gray day.  Everything looks so gloomy to me.  I see no color anywhere.  The orphanage is situated on large grounds.  Some of the buildings are very old, some newer.  We are escorted to a newer building.  It reminds me of a school, or an office.  Very official looking.  This building has many rooms. All of them have the doors shut. My heart is beating at some ridiculous pace. I walk along the hallway wondering what lies behind closed doors. Or maybe I don't really want to know. Maybe what lies behind those doors will break my heart in two.

I'm taken into a small office.  They say something to each other in Russian and a woman disappears into one of the tiny rooms.  She returns holding my beloved daughter, the treasure we committed to adopting first.  Nestled in her arms is my Hailee.  I recognize her instantly.  She has not changed one single bit from the photo we have.  She has the whitest of white hair and the tiniest body.



I drop my purse and don't even ask her if I can hold my child--my arms automatically reach out and grab her.  She is where she belongs...with her Mommy.



The room instantly fills with onlookers. They are all talking about me...I just know it.  But it does not matter.  Tears stream down my face as I hold my Hailee so tightly.  After months and months, she is finally with me. It is too much for my heart to contain.  I cannot stop the tears from flowing...and I don't care.



(please excuse the horrible quality of these pictures.  I asked the driver to take pics and he accidently changed the setting of the camera.  These were the only ones I could use.)

I loosen my embrace and admire the tiny angel in my arms.  Her size just breaks my heart.  She is no bigger than a little baby.  She cannot weigh more than 15 pounds.  Hailee will be five years old in just a few weeks.  I struggle to comprehend it all.  It is almost too much for my mother's heart to grasp.  How can this be?  How is it even possible for an almost-five-year-old to be so terribly tiny. The tears cannot stop, and I don't even try to stop them.  I don't care what they're saying about me.  I simply cannot believe I am finally here--holding the child I have dreamed of for so many months.

The onlookers are watching me intently.  Are they waiting for some kind of a reaction from me?  Tatianna has tears in her eyes.  She too is moved by the child in my arms. I can tell that she is wanting to know what I'm thinking. I turn to her, and through my tears I tell her, "What I see does not surprise me.  We have known all along that she is this small and delayed."

She seems relieved.

As I examine Hailee's sweet little face, something seems strange to me, but I cannot put my finger on exactly what it is.  A sick feeling is in my stomach.  Something is not right.  Hailee has a blank stare on her face.  She cannot focus on anything. She is moaning and groaning, and makes strange clicking sounds.  All things I know to be very common in institutionalized children. But something else is bugging me. Another doctor walks into the room and asks me if there is anything I would like to know.

Yes, there is.

"Is she on any medication?" I ask.

She looks through the stack of notes on her lap.  She says something to Tatianna.

"The doctor says that she is on medication.  She says they give her medicine for best sleep in the morning and in the evening."

Best sleep? 

Um, sleeping medicine?  A sedative?  Each morning AND each evening.

It all makes sense.  Oh my goodness. My child is drugged.  Day in and day out.  That's why she has the blank stare on her face.  She is unable to focus on anything. She is drugged. For almost five years of her life. She feels like a floppy ragdoll in my arms.

Tatianna asks me if I know why they do that.  I nod and tell her yes.

Of course I know why. The sweet little angel lying in my arms spends her days and her nights, sleeping.

Dear Lord Jesus, how can this be?

It's a lot to take in.  I pull her into my chest and weep for her. This treasure in my arms--just waiting to be found.  Waiting....and literally wasting away.  It is more than I can bear.

The next twenty minutes I spend just holding Hailee.  She molds into my body like she was always meant to be there.  I whisper words of hope and love into her ears.  I know she cannot understand me, but I pray that God would reassure her that everything is going to be better than okay.

The time passes by quickly.  Time is ticking by and they want us to leave before lunch.  I still have another daughter I need to meet.  With an aching heart I give my precious Hailee back to the caretaker.  I watch as they put her back where they got her from--a crib.

I pull myself together and we walk into another small office-like room.  Another caretaker quickly appears with a very sleepy little girl in her arms.  They had to wake her up from her nap.

Oh my heart.  I take the sleepy treasure and she lays her sweet little head on my chest.  She is trying hard to wake up. I recognize her beautiful eyes from the photo we have stared at for nine months.  She is my Harper. She has changed--she has actually grown since the picture was taken.  She is also very small but not alarmingly so like her sister.

We snuggle for a few minutes.  I am itching to look at her closely but relish the minutes I have just holding her close. She is an angel.  She looks more like a toddler now.  She has fine, wispy hair and the puffiest cheeks ever.  I can't help but lean down and kiss those sweet cheeks. 

Harper finally starts waking up a little more.  She sits up and checks me out as if to say, "Who in the world are you, and what kind of language are you speaking?"  She makes me smile.  I can tell that this one has a very sweet spirit.  Oh yes, she does.  She absolutely cannot keep that little tongue of hers in (very characteristic for DS children due to their low muscle tone), and it just warms my heart.



Within minutes Harper starts coming out of her shell a little.  She has a smile that can light up a room.  I think to myself that this little one is going to have her Daddy wrapped around her little finger.  She is as sweet as can be. She is trying to suck on my fingers--and gives me a little bite here and there.  I quickly discover that she does have teeth.

Then my sweet little angel looks up at me, lifts up her arms and reaches up to hug my neck.  Oh, my heart. She knew exactly where she wanted to be--around her Mommy's neck.  There she held on for dear life.  She clung and would not let go. 

At this point Valentine (my picture taker) has to leave the room.  The guy was overcome with emotion.  I don't think he knew that children like this even exsisted. They're all locked away. They're kept behind closed doors.They have no part in society whatsoever. It is all too much for him, and he goes out to get some fresh air.

I sit in the little chair, admiring the extra blessing God has just given us. She is a little ray of sunshine, I can tell instantly.

Harper is an angel.  Sent from the Most High God to be our daughter.  As I sit there, I cannot stop thanking the Lord for having us add Harper to our adoption.  We only set out to adopt Hailee--but He was very specific with us about bringing this little one home too.  As Harper hugged me over and over again, words of gratitude flowed to my Father in heaven.

What did we ever do to deserve such blessing, Lord?

All too soon there is a knock on the door.  They tell us that it's time for the children to have lunch and we must leave.

Nooooooo!

I wanted to stay.  I didn't want to leave my children there.  I wanted to grab them both and take them home with me.  But I couldn't.  Giving my precious Harper back into the arms of the caretaker, I left the room, went next door, gave Hailee one last kiss...and left.

I held it together all the way home. I walked in the door to my apartment and fell apart.  In just a few hours since getting off the train in the morning, I had experienced every possible emotion known to man.  I sobbed--out of emotion, but also out of gratitude to God.

I could not stop thanking Him for the beautiful gifts He had just given Anthony and me.

It was most certainly one of the most emotional days I have ever experienced.

I could hardly wait to get up this morning and go back to the orphanage.  They have given me permission to visit once a day in the morning.  Valentine arrived, and off we went.

We arrive at the orphanage to find that both girls are asleep (no surprises there).  I ask them if I can please have time alone with my children.  They agree, and give me the "zoo room" to use.  The room that smells like a pet store that has not been cleaned for six months and has birds, rabbits, and who knows what else in there. I'll take it if it means time alone, with no onlookers.

I gather my angels, and much to the caretaker's horror, we sit on the floor--just me and my girls. They clearly do not get to sit on the floor in this place. I want time to look them over, time to get to know who they are and what they are capable of doing at this point in their lives.  I've heard such conflicting things, and I want to see for myself.

It's glorious.

I get to touch their sweet skin, and kiss their little cheeks and tell them how desperately me and their Daddy love them.  I tell them all about their siblings at home and how excited they are to have them come home soon. 

I promise my family and friends I'll post pictures, so I try to capture their absolute sweetness through the lens of my camera.  This time my camera is on the right setting.  I triple check.

It's easy to get Harper to look my way. Poor baby has a cold. She is such a beauty.



Hailee took a bit more convincing. At almost five years old, she is unable to sit alone, so I prop her up against a puffy toy. Her neck is not very strong either, so I let her sit for a minute at a time, and then lie her down again. I managed to get her to look at the camera. She is so absolutely sweet and precious.

Even trying to sit for one minute at a time took a lot of effort for this treasure.  My heart ached for her.

I wondered how much time she has actually spent in an upright position in her life.  Not much at all, I'm sure.



I got to love and cuddle and just be Mommy for over an hour. I observed the way they are, and the things they can do and cannot do.

I learned quickly that everything I have been told about these two makes absolutely no sense. It does not take a mama long to figure her children out.



Precious Harper--a gift from above.



Sweet Hailee--we're blessed beyond description.



A determined little angel.



A sweetheart who knows nothing but life in a crib--now with such hope and potential.





My heart is full.

I am a mommy in love with two of the most incredible blessings under heaven and earth. I am emotionally drained, but ready to face the next days and weeks of finishing this process as fast as possible. I am willing to continue the fight until they are home, where they belong.  I am missing my family something ridiculous, but grateful for Skype.

There is much to share, so many things to tell. But tomorrow is another day.

How blessed we are that God has, once again, blessed us with riches stored in secret places, treasures of darkness.

Thank you for your love, support, and encouragement.  It truly has touched my heart so deeply.

81 sweet thoughts from friends:

Annerieke said...

How great and migthy is our God? These two angels brings so much hope and happiness to people all over the world! Thank God for creating them. Those sweet little faces, it is to much. So good, so beautiful. Wish you and your family a very blessed easter!

Love and huggs,

Annerieke

Holly said...

oh Adeye.
Weeping with you.
Oh Jesus....Oh Jesus. Thank you.
For setting the lonely into families...for HOPE...for a future.
Please Lord. PLEASE. Open the ears of Your people..let them hear the words GO. Please Lord. There are more like Hailee and Harper...they need love, family, HOPE.
Please Jesus. Use Adeye and her blog to stir the hearts of MANY.
Until there are NO MORE ORPHANS!!

Tamara said...

Adeye, I have no words. No words at all....only tears of joy that these little girls are going to spend their lives with you, Anthony and the kids. I cannot wait to see them blossom under the love of your home and God's provision. My heart also breaks for what is behind all those other doors. I cannot imagine the emotions you faced the last two days. Praising God that He is there with you giving you the strength to make it through each moment. Once you get the girls home this time away will be just a distant memory and the girls can start living the life that God intended for them to live. I know they are going to bless you beyond measure...That is what adoption does for us parents...but I am so happy that these girls are going to have the opportunity to be blessed beyond anything they could ever imagine. God is good and faithful and loves each of His children.

Milena said...

Tears are flowing and I lack words. What emotional days for you! How very blessed you are to have found each other!

Sally- That Girl! said...

I am weeping so much I can not formulate words in my head to type. All I can do is love on you from afar and tell you how blessed I am to know you. These two precious children of God have been redeemed on this beautiful Easter weekend. The life you are giving them is incredible all because you have been obedient to Him.

You didn't turn away in fear. You didn't let Satan take your eyes off the prize. There are so many easier roads you could have taken and you followed the one our Lord was leading you on! I only hope I can do the same!

Lisa said...

Oh Adeye, they are beautiful! Thank you again for sharing details. Please keep the blog posts coming. I hope you can get some rest - you've got to be so exhausted!

Kristin Ferguson said...

I am overwhelmed with gratitude that God has chosen you and Anthony to give these girls a family and a future. It deeply saddens me to think of what their lives may have been otherwise. I'm praying for your strength and patience as you wait to get those girls out of there and home where they belong!!!

They are both amazingly sweet and precious and I can't wait to get my HANDS ON THEM!!! :)

Love,Kristin

David and Sarah said...

Well, I can't imagine that anyone could have read that post with dry eyes. You are a blessed mama, and your girls are absolute treasures.

Blessings,
Sarah

Anna said...

This post both ripped my heart out but at the same time blessed me immensly. It rips my heart that Hailee who is a true beauty, look to be so young when she is infact 4 years old. It rips my heart that´s she´s sedated every night and morning.

But at the same time they are soo wonderful those girls. They are both so beautiful and innocent. To know that these girls will now have a future and a family is a true blessing.

I am kind of lost for words but I have gazed at the picture again and again and those beautiful pictures say more than a thousand words.

Praying for you with all my heart.

Caroline said...

Even though they are a little blurry, the pictures of your girls meeting their mommy for the first time are priceless.... Harper and Hailee are just beautiful! I'm sure they'll thrive under all your loving care. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. Take care!

Caroline

Rachel said...

adeye, you may want to ask what they are giving hailee and if you can have some to take a long when you go home because it may be a drug that, if stopped suddenly, may cause her to go into withdrawal. so sad to hear that she was so medicated, but also wanted to share this because withdrawal can cause serious health risks. your daughters are beautiful, but honestly cant wait until you can have them home and they can be cared for by their mama and papa all the time.

rachel27b said...

Your treasures are beautiful and they have felt their Mommy's arms holding them...how precious!. I am so blessed to have come across your blog and journey at this point in your lives. May you continue to see the Lord lighting every step of your way as you go through all the formalities in the Ukraine.

Lori said...

I can honestly say that I don't think I have ever been more moved by a blog post than with this one. Friend, I am sitting here with tears welling up in my eyes and my heart leaping. I am completely humbled and in awe of our Great God. All glory, honor and praise to Him alone.

Thank you so much for taking the time to share so many details, pictures and intimate moments. You are truly a treasure, my friend. And your girls...they are nothing short of princesses of the King. BEAUTIFUL!!!

Jo Snape said...

Oh Adeye - I cannot stop crying. What a blessing you are for those two beautiful little girls. There is SO MUCH hope for their future in your loving family. What a relief for you to finally meet your 2 girls! You are in my thoughts constantly. Take good care of yourself and enjoy your special moments together. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Much love as always Jo x

Anonymous said...

PRECIOUS! THANK YOU for pouringnout your heart to us! Can't wait to hear more.

Anonymous said...

Your daughters are so very very beautiful, and so very, very precious. I can't wait to adopt a few little ones with Down syndrome of my own.

Courtney Kay said...

they are beautiful!

Sophie said...

Oh dear friend,
What precious beautiful angels. I am crying as I'm reading your post and looking at your precious photos. I'm so deeply saddened that they are medicating Hailee, it breaks my heart for her but I rejoice in the fact that the Lord has blessed them beyond words with a loving mother and father who will care for them and nurture them. I will pray for you my friend as I can only imagine that this is as difficult as it is joyous.
blessings :)

Kim K. said...

Oh my. I can't even imagine the flood of physical and emotional strains you must have felt seeing your two precious daughters. They are just breath-taking. May God give you the courage and strength to get through this next part of your journey. Easter blessings.

Cammie Heflin said...

Oh my goodness, I am just bawling! Your girls are so beautiful and blessed to have you as their mommy! Harper is quite the little looker isn't she!?!?! Hailee is going to be the next Ava Urban!! Love to you, praying always!

Tesseraemum said...

Oh My, How sweet are they?!! Harper is going to keep her siblings on their toes! Tell them to get ready!! Hailee is just going to blossom when she gets home! She has a spark that is buried in her tiny body! You can see it in her eyes! Congrats!!! Sheri

Anonymous said...

We are blessed that we will be able to meet them. Absolutely cannot wait.
Love,
Shauna and fam

Anonymous said...

Oh, my friend. Such fairy-like little treasures they both are! So fragile, and yet so held completely together by God's great love as they have waited so long for you, and you for them. I think my heart stopped as I read your account and kept looking at the photos. I will be reading and looking dozens of times again, just to try to "touch" and "know" them through your telling. It must be so hard to write anything at all to all of us, when you can barely process this great mystery that is unfolding before you! I wish, too, that Anthony could be with you through every step. But soon enough, you will ALL be together as family. I cannot imagine having to walk away from the girls that are YOURS, but every day will count for His glory as you go through all the doors. I love you and am praying continually for stamina, peace, wisdom and joy to be yours. Your church family is covering you! Hold on to Jesus, as He holds on to you and Hailee and Harper.

Anonymous said...

Praying for you from the UK, so lovely to see you finally meeting your girls.

Katie

Danna said...

Oh they are so breath-takingly beautiful! I am so glad your babies are in their Mommy's arms..:) Can't wait to hear more about your trip and see Harper and Hailee come home to their forever family! Praying for you and your family daily!

Lynsay said...

Of course I, like I know everyone else has too, have been waiting for this post, thank you for giving it to us!

Oh Adeye, my heart hurts for you and my tears are tears of a mom who can't imagine leaving my kids behind every day or the injustice of what they have gone through, yet also tears filled with hope knowing what you have been given is an incredible blessing and that God is bringing Hailee and Harper a new life with a family and with HOPE!

Love you and continually pray for you and your treasures you left behind at home too!

Barbra said...

ADEYE!!!! Reading your story is like receiving a wonderful gift. Your daughters are so PRECIOUS! I am so thankful God lead you to each other.

Julie said...

They are beautiful! yes... everything that you have heard or will hear about your children are more than likely not true. You are right... it takes a mom knowing her children before we know the truth.

I remember those emotions all too well. But rest Assured, your hubby spoke the correct thing when he said you are not alone, you have an army of angels with you, and they are fighting with you to bring those little ones home.

Chandra said...

Tears are flowing! But word of praise also. Thank you Jesus!

Your treasures are truely beautiful! And to think they have never been treasured on Earth before, I know you and your family will make up for all that. Blessing to you and your family.

Prayers of Praise & Thanksgiving, God be with you, give you rest & peace of mind.

Chris and Sarah said...

I don't even know what to say. They are soooo beautiful though and I'm so glad their with their momma.

I'm linking my blog to yours. People need to hear you my friend!

Jean said...

Reading your post is so incredible- thank you, thank you for bringing us along on this amazing God inspired journey!

Your daughters are beautiful, each day you will slowly unlock their potential until we no longer see a bud but instead a bloom!

What a blessing they are!

You are not alone! You can do this! God is carrying you through it all, right now! Think of the poem "Footprints"

Susan A said...

I am so glad that YHWH has given you the opportunity to rescue Hailee and Harper from a bleak future to a real family with siblings that love Him... Praise His name!! :)

p.s. sorry for double posting, I wasn't sure if the first one went through.

Shonni said...

Oh my goodness, Adeye...I have been waiting to see them and hear your story...they are BEATUIFUL. I am beyond words at what the LORD is choosing to do in you family...thank you for sharing your journey with us!

Linnea said...

I love following your story. How little your girls are. I cried when I saw little Hailee(the almost 5 yr old), I think. She is so tiny. They tell us our daughter is sleepy all the time too making us think they are drugging her. My heart breaks for these children. Thank the Lord for people like you. I cant fathom what their lives would be like without you. Be strong. Praying for your family.
Be blessed

Amy L said...

They are beautiful! Such precious blessings that God has given to you! Thank you for sharing your pictures and your loving thoughts about your new daughters.
Amy
RR

Adrienne said...

I was waiting fo rthis post and it is joyful to read.....Thank God for leading you to be these little girls' Mommy! What beautiful little girls.... Can't wait to see how they will flourish with the abundance of love and attention that is awaiting them in your home....

Hugs & Prayers
Adrienne

trustandobey said...

Wow Adeye,
Both girls are beautiful!!! Harper looks as though she might keep you busy:) Hailee is tiny but looks so alert in today's photo. You are right...total tresures...diamonds in a field waiting to be discovered. Did you see Jesus while you were there? He is there...holding the hand of each of those forgotten treasures until a family says "yes". Awesome!!!

Lisa said...

They are both so very beautiful! How amazing will it be when you can take them HOME, where they belong? It already seems like they have been yours forever. They will be so loved and will love tenfold in return...

Anita said...

The girls are so beautiful! Thank you so much Adeye for letting us follow your journey! You and your entire family are an inspiration. God bless and stay strong.

Anita

Dardi said...

Adeye, you have no idea what a blessing this post is for me. As we prepare to bring our son home...it really just hit home on so many levels. Thank you for taking the time to share your special time & being an encouragement to so many!

I pray that the Lord's angels continue to be encamped around you, your girls & your family.

Debbie said...

Adeye, Your girls are gorgeous! Just precious. I'm so happy to see photos of you with your babies. The photos of the girls that you took are amazing! Breathtaking. Tears are flowing! I can't wait until your next update. Praying that you can get some sleep and stay healthy. Praying for your babies as they wait for you to visit each day. Praying that bonding will start to take place. Praying for your precious family who is waiting for your return. Love you!

Anna's Family said...

Adeye~

We are so blessed to be able to follow your journey. What a daughter of the Highest King you are! I am sitting here today so tearful from the hope just your presence now represents in your babies lives. Even for just an hour a day you are giving them something so needed....complete & unconditional love. All three of you are in our prayers right along with your family here in the States. Happy Easter sweet friend & get some rest so that you can stay healthy!

Jo Gooden & Family

Shawn, Shelley, Emily, Sarah, Lauren, AnnaGrace and Avery said...

Thank you for sharing your beautiful girls with us. They truly are gifts from God. I will be praying for the days to pass quickly until you are able to bring them home. I am so thankful they have you for a mama!
I hope you have a blessed Easter!
In Him~Shelley

Margarete said...

I saw your dad and all the rest of your kiddos at Wal-Mart today. I could tell they were having a great time with him. They all said they missed you and can't wait to meet their new sisters. Hailee and Harper are the cutest babies. I'm so happy for you and your family. I can't wait to meet them before you go on your way back east.

Tony and Rett said...

Adeye...Oh friend! I am bawling here. God is alive! He is there in that room with you and your gorgeous treasures! He set this appointment and I feel so privileged to be able to see it all unfold.

Thank you for sharing your heart. Thank you for sharing your treasures. Thank you for everything. I am praying praying praying for you and your daughters.

Love you, friend!

Nicole said...

CONGRATS!!! The girls are beautiful!!!! Hanging on every post as you continue your journey!!!

:-)
-Nicole
www.bakerssweets.blogspot.com

soontobemomof9 said...

Oh Adeye, I am so HAPPY for you and your girls! Precious little girls, both of them! Praise God!

Harpers little cheeks just make me smile, she looks so much like her baby picture!

And Hailee, just a beautiful little girl. Brown eyes adn blonde hair? LOVE IT! :)

I KNOW that drugged look. Yana was drugged the 3rd day we were there.... it scared me, as the 2 days before that she was as different as night and day!

Their mama is there, and healing will come! Praise God again! So fitting that you are there over Easter!

Praying you through quickly my friend!

Andrea said...

What amazing beautiful gifts!!! Oh Adaye! What a gift!

The McEacherns said...

So exciting that you finally got to meet and hold them! What a mutual blessing that must have been!

Mandi said...

Oh Adeye, they are absolutely precious. They are beautiful. I am beyond happy and thankful that you are finally with your daughters. God is SO good.

I look forward to seeing many more pictures and smiles from your angels.

Hugs,
Mandi

Marian said...

These two little angels are most certainly treasures fro darkness! I have wept in joy for them and for you for several hours now... Their medication fogged world will slowly be brightening with colors and sensations they have yet to even dream about. It may be scary at first, but I just know they will blossom! I will be glued to my iPod to catch every post!

Karin said...

Oh Adeye...I am nearly speechless. Such an incredible, moving post. They are precious...beautiful. I think that Harper will be such a help to Hailee. I bet Hailee will work hard to keep up with Harper and it will be like having a built-in physical therapist. God is sooooo good. I love reading this beautiful story. Praying for you, sweet friend.

Barbara Owen said...

What a joyful time in your life!!! How indescribable and yet you are able to tell us about it. You are amazing! Just as you are not alone, neither are your precious angels. Jesus is right there with them keeping them safe for you. I pray you can get some sleep and have supernatural energy for the days ahead. Can't wait to read more. Love you.

SupermomE11 said...

I am sitting here just crying tears of all sorts of emotions reading this post...What an amazing, wonderful story to read for Easter. The story of your family and these beautiful girls finding love, family and hope is SUCH a true miracle. As a mother of an adopted baby with significant medical needs and delays, I can tell you and promise you what you already know, but what so much of the world will not see or understand... your life will be as blessed by these girls and they will by yours.
Please know that me and my family is thinking of you and praying for you and Hailee and Harper and that the trip home will be sooner than later and will go well. I have no doubts that these beautiful angels will just blossom with your love and care.
Happy Easter. :)
Love and hugs,
Erin

Angie said...

Adeye, I'm just speechless. They are beautiful angels and are beginning a journey that can't even imagine. Hugs to all three of you as you spend these wonderful mornings together learning about one another. God is indeed so, so good. And Happy Easter to you!

Dawn said...

Thank you Lord for your blessings to Anthony and Adeye. thank you for sharing you experiences... I am sure your blog story of your adoptions will open doors and hearts for more children to come home to more families...

Mom to 9 Blessings! said...

Adeye, I can barely keep it together to type this comment. Oh sweet friend! I ache for you and with you! I understand all that you shared and praise God that He alone has brought you to this place - prepared you for a time such as this! Hold onto the word Anthony gave you and trust that God will continue to go before each day that you are there. I'm thrilled to see you holding your beautiful and precious girls. When you get home if you would like I can help you with some nutrition information to get the girls stronger and do a safe detox with them too. I'm sending many prayers up tonight for you! Lots of love - Happy Easter - HE IS RISEN!

Jill

The Wendler Family said...

Be still my heart! LOVED reading this! So good to see up to date pictures of your Angels!
For the record, I am so sorry about Hailee and them medicating her. What devastating news! I can't wait till you can take them both out of there and love and mother them full time! I'm sure Hailee will make some serious progress when she is not medicated all of the time.
God is so great!!!! Praising Him for your much anticipated arrival and your daughters entry into your life and arms!!

Holly said...

I've been waiting for this post!! They are BEAUTIFUL!! Absolutely gorgeous, each of them. And you can see that hope in their eyes. They have a family...and the chance to know God someday. It's all too much to wrap our minds and emotions around. We will continue to pray for you all!

Mama D.'s Dozen said...

What a powerful, heartfelt, emotional post! Thank you for sharing all of the details. So. So. Sad. ... the things that they have not experienced. Yet, so. so. amazing. ... that God has given these girls to your family to raise.

Blessings,

Laurel :)

Rachel said...

Fineally - praise be to our awesome God, these precious children are in their mommas arms where they belong.

I am so overwhelmed with joy and happiness for you and your girls.

I know you must be soaking in every moment.

Sending you lots of love XXXXXX

Tara said...

Oh, Adeye...I don't even know what to say. I am overcome with excitement...sadness...happiness...I simply cannot imagine what you are feeling!!! Thank you for sharing; I'm already awaiting the next post. What treasures they are indeed!!!

heatherbrown said...

Oh, they are sooo stunning....such lcuky, blessed girls, and such a lucky, blessed mama as well! I cant wait to see more!

Sean and Lisa said...

God is so good! Thank you for sharing your journey with us. May God use your words to touch others hearts, open their eyes, and that more people would journey into adoption seeking out His precious treasures from the darkness!

Shelley said...

Could hardly wait to hear about your first meeting, and the photos! As I waited for my shopping daughter in my car today, I prayed for a quick homecoming for you and the girls, and thanked God again and again for remembering the forgotten! The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus came that we might have LIFE, and life ABUNDANT! Happy Resurrection Day in many more ways than one.
With joy,
Shelley

Janine Claire Robinson said...

The sweetest little salem girls! I am celebrating with u my friend. Thank u for sharing your journey with us! I am trusting with u that God speeds up the process for u all to be at home together. How I would love to be a fly on the wall when the family meets these two angels!!! Love u so much my friend xoxoxo

schoolmother said...

Wow, what wonderful, beautiful posts about wonderful, beautiful girls. Very, very precious. Congratulations.
Joy,RR

Tami said...

Adeye,
I am just sobbing...with sadness that your babies have had to endure so much in their short lives...with happiness that you have come to save them.

Those babies are beautiful gifts from God, and I will thank Him every day for leading you to them!

My love to you and Hailee and Harper,
Tami

taryn said...

Hi Cuz! Been trying for ages to work this Comment thing out... hopefully it works this time. You are truelly an amazing Mommy filled with so much of God's precious love to give. Send my love and kisses to Anthony and all your beautiful babies.
God Bless
Ta xxx

connie said...

Oh, Adeye, I can't stop the tears here! What a bittersweet post you've written - from the despair to the HOPE! The Father has blessed you so much, and your daughters' lives are forever changed!
Love to you, friend!

Karien Prinlsoo said...

Adeye, thank you so much for sharing. May God be with you every step you take and may HE give you favor, that you cannot even anticipate. I know with love,caring, affection and acceptance, Hailey ill surprise everybody. You are so welcome to pop in at www.downsyn.com
There are many wonderful parents and many who have adopted through
RR
Karien Prinsloo from Centurion,
South Africa

Mom Of Many said...

Oh thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus....part of my Bible study this morning: Psalms 68:6 He sets the lonely in families...

Could it get any lonelier? I think not.

They are beautiful - absolutely beautiful...treasures from the hand of God...never lonely again!!

So proud of you Adeye!! You are one brave and strong woman...

Praying for you from your state! Much love!! xo

Marie-Claude said...

How great to see these precious gifts from God. I am moved beyond words and tears rolled down my face. Thank you sharing this precious time of your life, we are with you, in prayers.

Marie-Claude

Jo's Corner said...

I do believe that there is a new river on this earth, what with all of the tears that have been shed over the last two posts! And, yes...I contributed mine as well!
What Perfect little girls! Gods Masterpieces! Tiny, Sweet Hailee with her "cocoa bean" eyes. They are so very dark and beautiful. She is just this dainty, wee little Angel. I believe that there is a reason for that! (Besides the obvious health issue). I think she needs to be an infant (size) so that you and your family can care for her like you would care for an infant. Finally, she will get ALL of the love and nurturing that a new baby has to have to grow. And, she needs that to finally develop and grow into the Perfect little flower she is. My Heart is just full of love for that tiny girl. And, Admiration for the inner strength and the fight/will to live, in spite of the conditions she has been in! There is a Great story just waiting to unfold as she grows under the watchful eyes of a Mama and Papa! She truly is Precious, Adeye!

And, then there's Miss Harper...oh my, such Beauty! And, I think she looks a lot like her Mama! There is a sparkle in her BEAUTIFUL blue eyes that suggest a vigorous desire to live and love in the fullest manner! I can't wait to see her thrive in the love of her Forever Family!

Adeye, my Precious Friend, can I say that our Father in Heaven has given you a Heart that is SO full of His Love?! I think you are stronger than you know. I love how you just took Hailee out of that workers arms and into your own! How you didn't care WHAT they all were saying. Your Mama instinct kicked right in! (I'm not sure that I would have been so brave!!! That worker looked kinda tough to me!) The look on her face was priceless! To see this pretty little blonde just sweep in there and TAKE "her girl"...Outstanding!! HE has given you everything you need to get through this time in your life! It's Amazing to see what a Mama can/will do for her babies! You Rock, Sister!

The photos are absolutely beautiful. You really captured the girls and who they are. I look forward to seeing more and to read your always fascinating updates!

How is your family doing? Besides missing you like crazy! I would love to hear what they feel about their new family members! I have been Praying for them many times each day. And, for You, as well. Please, take care of YOU! Eat well and sleep as much as you can. For soon you will have two babies to care for!

Love you much! Jo

Melinda said...

This post just blows me away! Adeye my prayers are with you as you get to know those precious girls that are truly special gifts from God. I can't imagine how beautiful and hard at the same time this must be as you have to leave your girls everyday and do this without your husband by your side. What you describe just absolutely breaks my heart. This should not be the reality for your girls or for any child. God please forgive us for allowing this to happen. This is why adoption is so important and as Christians we need to read this and then ACT!!!!! Thank you for sharing your heart and for allowing us to see one of Gods true miracles called adoption! Happy Easter!!

blessedmomto8 said...

I support you 100%, but I like many others have no words but just love and gratitude for you my friend...

Maria and Family said...

I do not think I have ever seen more beautiful little angels. They are going home just in time to blossom :) (((hugs)))

TanyaLea said...

Oh Adeye!...I don't think I have ever been more touched by a post than I have this one. I want the WHOLE world to see and read this. You have done such a wonderful job shining a light here, and I am SO greatful for your faithfulness and the love of Jesus that just SHINES through you!

Oh the tears and the heaviness my heart feels right now. I'm still in shock that your little peanut is almost 5... REALLY?! ~ FIVE?!!? Oh how can this be?? But I know, I just KNOW that she is going to thrive when she gets out of that place...when she is HOME with her new family, receiving the unconditional love that she was always meant to receive. You are a true inspiration and I thank you for sharing 'your story' with all of us. Praying that it reaches far and that there will be MORE children brought home from there into loving families like your's.

We will be praying for that 10-day WAIVER and that God will shine brightly through you onto these people. Afterall, "they shall know that we are Christians by our LOVE"!!

Big Hugs,
~ Tanya

Melanie said...

Oh my...how beautiful, sweet, and sad all the same time. I can just see how inteligent Harper is anf I know that she will grow with your love. Hailey is so beautiful, too . THey both are just beuatiful girls. How tragic to think of how many children share the same sad daily life. Now, these girls will grow and be loved. I am praying that this process will go guickly. God Speed to you.
Melanie

Anonymous said...

I cannot stop the tears that are flowing.... I have got no words.... Thank you Jesus... Love Janelle

Brianna Heldt said...

This is so beautiful and amazing. Your daughters are PRECIOUS. God is so good. Love this. Thank you so much for sharing this!

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