The days are flying by! In just two days I will be on my way back to Bulgaria. It almost feels surreal that Hasya and Kael will finally be coming home. I remember feeling that way with all of our adoptions. The wait feels so long and agonizing...and then all of a sudden you are ready to board a plane to go and bring them home.
As much as I am trusting God in all the details of this homecoming, I must admit that when I stop for long enough to think about all the things that could potentially be very difficult, a feeling of uncertainty wants to rise up in my heart. I trust God completely--with everything I have--but the reality is that I know all too well how potentially difficult this journey could be for our Hasya.
It was just last August that I spent a week visiting her in the orphanage. She could not handle being taken out of her crib. It was absolutely terrifying for a little girl who has spent nearly fifteen years of her life staring at the ceiling with very little human interaction. She could handle the first few minutes of being held, and then it all became too much and she would begin to cry inconsolably. The only way I could bring her much-needed comfort was to take her back to the safety of her crib and spend time with her in her environment.
The world outside of the bars of that crib is a very frightening place!
My heart aches just thinking about how difficult this transition could be for Hasya! Not only is she being taken out of her place of safety, but she is also going with a person whom she does not know and who speaks a different language. Everything is going to change. Many older children do just fine with the transition from orphanage to family. But for Hasya, things are different. The only world she knows is one where she lies on her back and chews her fingers until they are calloused.
Many people have written to ask me how they can pray. Well, my first request is definitely for Hasya. We are praying with everything that is within us that God is preparing her heart even now for the changes that will happen next week! We are asking the God of the universe to fill her tiny, emaciated body with peace which passes all understanding...that she would know that she is safe with me and that she would not feel stressed or anxious. We are praying that the Father would hold her wounded heart in the palm of His hand and that Hasya will know that she belongs.
I will have five days with Hasya before we fly home. In that time she needs to take food and liquids from me. Being so terribly malnourished (she only weighed about 25 pounds last August), this is critical! Please trust with us that she will eat and drink--she cannot afford to not be nourished! We do not want to end up in the hospital because of dehydration, or anything else.
And then there are the long flights home. Oh my! Peace, peace, and more peace! Please pray that Hasya will do well on those long flights (where I will have to hold her the entire way because she cannot sit unassisted). Pray that she will not stress and that the journey home will be uneventful. Please also pray and that I can keep Hasya as comfortable as possible--her limbs are so stiff and contracted from lack of movement and sheer neglect for so many years!
Also, if you could pray for my precious boy Kael and his adjustment out of the orphanage we would be so grateful. Please pray that he knows very quickly so deep down in his little heart that I am his mama and that he bonds immediately. That would be so wonderful.
And lastly, my dearest husband will be holding down the fort here at home next week. Would you trust with us that no sickness or harm would come upon my family here. In particular, please pray that Harper would remain healthy and croup-free! A midnight dash to the ER would not be good while I am away!
Yes, there are many potential challenges as I look ahead to next week. But of this I am certain...God never calls us to easy! He calls us to do the hard things, the painful things, and the things which will stretch and grow us. He calls us to do the things which ultimately display His glory and His faithfulness!
I don't want easy...I only want Jesus!
As Moses cried out to God when challenged, "Show me your glory, Lord!"
Thank you so much for joining your prayers with ours as we bring these two precious angels home. We stand in awe of what the Lord has done to get us this far. Though we are the ones who said yes when God called us, so many of you have played a part in their rescue by helping us with the ransom to bring them home, and by praying since we began this journey ten months ago. We are truly grateful! We could never have gotten this far without the body of Christ supporting us on the journey. From the bottom of our hearts...thank you!
How exceedingly blessed we feel that God has chosen us...two very imperfect, often missing the mark, desperately needing His grace, parents to love these two children who He adores! I cannot wait to wrap my arms around them and never, ever let them go!
I will post as much as I can next week. And I will keep my Facebook updated too (you are welcome to follow along, just send me a friend request).
Blessing the name of the Lord today.