winds of change

Oh my goodness gracious--three days without a post.  Something must be up, huh?

No major catastrophe...thank you, Jesus.

It's just called BUSYNESS!

I seriously feel like I am burning the candle at both ends.  Life has just been way too busy for my liking. I feel like I am constantly rushing, organizing, planning.

Our dossier has gone...that was a huge relief.  But it seems that everything else that got put on the back burner while I had my head buried in our dossier, has now surfaced.

And I'm feeling swamped!

Yesterday was a glorious day, however.  I got some much needed time out of the house and some precious moments with a dear friend.  Shonni and I spent the day painting one of her bedrooms.  We literally left our fifteen kids to play on their own...and we painted.  The good news is that they were exceptionally good.  They played and played and played.  I have come to the conclusion that Anthony and I are definitely going to have to do some arranged marriage stuff with her kiddos.  They are blessed with the most amazing treasure on this earth.

It was so good to be able to spend time with my dear friend.  Very soon we will be miles and miles apart.

Yep, our family is on the move at the end of May.  The Lord has clearly directed us back to the East coast--where we lived for three years before coming here.

It is such a bittersweet move.  We own a home there which is so very affordable.  What a financial blessing it will be for our family.  We also have precious friends there--but unfortunately we leave many behind here.  And that is hard!

The Lord has spoken, though.  And He has confirmed that this IS the right thing to do, not only for us, but for two little treasures who will be joining our family soon.

Do you remember I met a sweet baby girl with Down syndrome a couple of weeks ago?  The Lord did many things in my heart as I spent time with her that day.  He used my time with baby M to confirm something major in my heart.  It was one of those times that I knew that I knew without a shadow of a doubt that the LORD was speaking to my heart.  I shared with Anthony, and as we prayed in the days to come, we knew that this move was the right thing for our family...and specifically for Hailee and Harper.

We live at an altitude of 8500 feet above sea level.  It is seriously high up here. The air is so thin.  Even climbing up stairs can take your breath away.  Sweet baby M has not lived here for long,  just a few months.  The little angel cannot breathe up here in the mountains--she has to be on oxygen 24/7.  Even though her heart has been surgically repaired, still she cannot breathe. Poor baby. The high altitude is too hard on her little body.

Hailee and Harper both have heart defects.  Neither are repaired. We know that Hailee's heart is in bad shape, which is probably why she weighs only around 15 pounds at almost 5 years old. Our girls currently live at, or near, sea level.  A move up here is going to be a serious shock to their little systems.  We're concerned for them--even if it means just being here for a few weeks.  We absolutely have to get them to a low altitude.  There is no doubt about it.  The last thing we want is for them to struggle to breathe, or be on oxygen for months on end.  That is no way to live. They are going to have enough to deal with already.  This is one potential problem that we can definitely avoid by getting them to lower ground.

There are times when we just have to do what we have to do--even if there is a price to be paid.  This is one of those times for our family.  We have to do this for our daughters, it is the right thing, without a doubt.

It is hard for us to leave people that we love. Journeying across the USA soon after coming home is going to be a tough operation.  But we know the Father will take care of every little detail, and every burden on our hearts. It is going to be just fine.

And that's why I'm so busy, dear friends.  I have a house to sort out before I travel to bring the girls home.  Our home on the East coast is so much smaller than the one we are in now--so I have a whole lot of purging to do.  The last thing I'm going to want to do is sort it all out when I return with my angels, so I have to do it now.  Which is fine--it just takes time and effort.

Our hearts are so at peace with this decision.  When we follow His will, and the gentle guiding of the Holy Spirit, there truly is peace which passes all understanding.

We're putting one foot in front of the other and following Jesus...no matter where that may lead us, no matter what the cost.

that time of year

Aaahh, the joys!  The end of February is notoriously that time of year in our family. 

The lure of the snow has totally worn off.  The novelty of sledding and building snowmen has become a distant memory.

Yes, it's February.

The end of February.

And it's that time again.

The time when cabin fever has set in big time!  Five little treasures are climbing the walls--they're tired of being indoors, they have way too much energy, they're longing for warm weather.

When it's only twenty degrees outside, and it means yet another day indoors--my lovies come up with some pretty creative ideas to entertain themselves. Very creative.

I painted one wall in our kitchen with chalkboard paint.  My kids love it.  They have, however, come up with some rather unique ways to use the wall to it's maximum potential.

Who said a chalkboard was only for drawing on?

It may start out that way...a little bit of finger painting.

Hannah-Claire, sit on the chair while I master the art of make-up artistry.

Come on, little brother, let's make our sister look beautiful.

Go get some more color.  We really want to make her look bright and cheery on this cold day.

That's right...just a little more blue on her cheeks.  Blue is definitely her color. So delightful on olive skin.

Perfect!  Chalk make-up.  Very glam.

Let's do you next, Cade.  Oh what a great idea--let's paint on your face with a paint brush.  Much more precision with a brush. Darn, mom said we could not use her real make-up brushes.  Oh well, this will work just fine.

Blue and green go so well together, don't you think?

A little bit of finger painting for extra effect.

And white.  White is his color.

Phew--this make-up stuff makes a whole lot of concentration. How in the world does mom even do this every day?  Praise God I'm a BOY!

Note to mother: haircuts, haircuts, haircuts!!!

Dashing!

Oh this is too much fun, this group effort painting.

The perfect way to pass a few hours on a wintery day. Very satisfying.

Are we the only ones with serious cabin fever?

Is it Spring YET?  Oh please tell us it's on the way very soon.  Like yesterday!

an urgent need

Adoption fundraising is hard, as many of you know.  It takes a huge amount of time, energy, and faith. Not many of us have $25 000+ sitting in the bank to pay the ransom to bring a child home.  We do it in absolute faith and trust God to meet us every step of the way.  And He does.  Every. Single. Time.

One of my blog friends has organized an amazing on-line fundraiser. They are almost ready to travel to bring home their sweet little boy...but are short some of the money they still need.  Please, please, please (yes, I'm begging) consider going to their fundraiser blog and taking part in their fundraiser.  This is their final attempt at bringing in the last little bit they still need. Any small amount adds up.

Please consider sowing seed into their adoption.  There are some awesome things you can win too!

~~~~~

I just found out that our dossier got delivered this morning!  Glorious news.  Another step closer.

Last night I took the plunge and ordered my cloth diapers.  Now I just have to figure out how in the world to use them.  Thank you to all of you who shared your cloth diapering experiences with me.

I read through and studied every single one of your comments and the tons of e-mails I received about traveling home with Hailee and Harper.  The general consensus---be prepared! Because we have absolutely no idea what kind of shape they are in, how big they are, who likes to be held, and who doesn't, how their muscle tone is, etc--I should be prepared for anything.  So, I'm going to do just that.  I'm planning on taking two slings/baby carriers and a double umbrella stroller.  That should cover all my bases.  Also, the advice to get in touch with the airline is brilliant.  I'll do that.

So thankful to have you all in my life.

oh happy day

I am absolutely exhausted--but what a happy day this has been.

I left home early this morning in eight degree weather and some nasty road conditions. There sure is not much that can stand in the way of a mommy-on-a-mission, is there?

My mission? To have our final documents--our corrected police clearances--apostilled in Denver. They arrived in the mail on Saturday, and today just had to be the day to get them authenticated for our dossier. I had had enough of all the delays and all the obstacles that have stood between us and our girls.

The trip was uneventful, what usually takes just less than two hours from our house to Denver, took closer to three hours due to icy, snow-covered roads. I finally arrived at the Secretary of State building. I told the nice man at the front desk what I needed, handed him my documents, paid my $140 (rip off!), watched him print out the authentication letters, said thank you very much, and left. All of maybe five minutes for $140! Nice.

Thankfully, by the time I headed home, the roads were so much better. Next stop? The UPS store. I spent ages there photocopying each document and getting them in precise order. Oh, and I checked ten thousand times that I had, indeed, remembered every single document. This process has made me completely paranoid I tell you. I scrutinized that pile of paperwork as if my life depended on it. Then I remembered that Hailee and Harper's lives do depend on it.

And so, my dear friends, after months and months of endless paperwork trials, I am happy to tell you that our dossier officially left for our daughter's country tonight.

What a journey it has been. From the time we began my citizenship process (which we had to do in order for us to adopt Hailee--due to my hubby being over the age limit), to putting our dossier together, it has truly felt like one battle after the next. Time and time again, the enemy has tried to derail us, tried to discourage us, and gone out of his miserable way to ensure that we failed in our attempt to rescue these sweet children.

But the battle always belongs to the Lord, doesn't it?

And the victory is always His. Always.

I was so emotional as I mailed this sweet envelope today. All those documents inside there represented one thing...

Two more children about to be rescued from darkness and brought into His glorious light. 

Now we pray for a first week of April travel date.

Oh happy day!

Thank you for journeying with me, friends.  Thank you for your love, your support, and your encouragement along the way.  I am so thankful.

a heart of thankfulness

How can I ever thank you all enough for the advice you shared about bringing home Hailee and Harper?  Thank you to every single one of you who took time to share your thoughts and experiences with me.  I still have so many emails to get through. I am so glad that I posted about my little dilemma--you guys have shared things that I never even thought of. You have given me so much to consider. Thank you for all the wisdom you so openly shared.  I appreciate it more than you can know.

A few of you asked whether Anthony could do the latter part of the trip so that he could come home with me and the girls.  The answer is no.  There is no way that can work.  Unfortunately he has to be there for the first two and a half weeks so that he can go through the court process with me.  Once that is done, he is free to leave.  He absolutely has to get home so that he can go back to work.

I will have to stay for about a month.  Heavens, I have no idea how I am going to manage being away from my family for that long. I have never been away from them for a long time. Ever. It definitely is one of the negatives about adopting from this country.  The travel is l-o-n-g.  I know the Lord will take care of all of our hearts. When He says GO, He takes care of all the little details and the things near and dear to our hearts, doesn't He?

An entire month in country will give me lots of time to bond with Hailee and Harper.  Though I cannot take them out of the orphanage, I can visit them in the orphanage.  I'm sure the three of us will have lots of time to get to know each other before we journey home. My prayer is that by the time we get on the first train to head home, that they know I'm their mommy!

Some mentioned the possibility of taking our oldest son with us. Connor is only ten years old. Yes, it would be possible to take him. But, his Grandpa (my Dad) is coming from South Africa to take care of him, and the rest of his siblings while we are away. I think that would be way more appealing to him than spending a month overseas.  It is so hard on all of us not having close family around--so when they do come and visit, it is a big deal for my children.  They make the most of every minute they have with extended family.  I am thrilled to leave him here just because I know he will have the best time with his grandpa (whom he misses something awful).  My heart smiles at the thought of my son spending quality time with someone he loves and rarely gets to see.  I just couldn't take him away.

I am so deeply touched by how many of you said that you would gladly meet me there to fly home with me and the girls.  Oh how I appreciate that you care.  You guys are so sweet.  Really. Though you cannot go with me, it is so comforting to know that many will be praying us all the way home.  That's good enough for me.

I really am okay with flying home alone with Hailee and Harper.  There are far more difficult things in this life that God could call me to do.  I honestly do consider it a privilege to be able to go and rescue these two girls from certain death.  If it means doing the trip home alone--then so be it.

I did get some emails where some expressed concern about me traveling alone with my girls.  I do appreciate your concern. But, the way I see it is that if all I ever did was look for the easy road in this life (the uncomplicated, smooth sailing path), I would rob God of opportunities to show Himself faithful in my life.  This is one of those times. I don't have a choice, friends.  It's do it this way--or not adopt Hailee and Harper at all. Those are my choices. Well, the latter is just not even an option.

If it means that I have to sacrifice, be a little uncomfortable, dig a little deeper in my faith, lean on my Savior a little more, go for an extended time without sleep...so be it!  Every sacrifice will be so worth it.  I know that the Father will enable me and equip me to accomplish the task He has laid out before me.  And do it well.  As far as I know, nobody ever died of sleep deprivation, or traveling alone with two children with Down syndrome.  I think I'm gonna live to tell the story right here on my blog {grin}.

This is one of those times in my life where I know that, "I CAN do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me."

Oh, before I forget, someone asked me about Hailee and Harper's hearts.  Both girls have heart conditions.  From what we know, Hailee's is worse than Harper's.  But we're not positive. We just know that they both have heart conditions.  We'll only know the severity of it once we're home.

~~~~~

And while I'm pondering, expecting, planning and waiting...I just could not resist buying these two adorable little outfits for my angels.  I know, I know...I have no idea how big they are and I did say I was going to wait to buy things until I got home.  But sheeesh, for just $5 each, they had my girls names written all over them as I walked past the little girl isle.

Soon they'll have sweet little bodies in them.  And I can hardly wait.

if you were me

What would you do?

If you were traveling alone with two virtual babies on an international flight (and a few domestic flights, and train too).  Oh, and the kids had Down syndrome...minor little detail.

How would you do it?

Help me out here...I need some practical mommy brains to think this out with me.

Some have advised me to get one of these slings that goes on your back. One in the front, and one on the back. But it's not really an option. Traveling alone, I would have no one to help me load and unload the baby on the back.

Too hard.

 

This definitely IS an option.  I already have one sling, and can purchase another.  But, is it as easy as it looks?

  

I guess if Hailee and Harper are different different sizes, I could still make the double sling thing work.

Do you think it would be practical though?  Any of you ever carried two babies in slings?

  

Or, I could do one in an umbrella stroller, and one in a sling.  My only concern is that being in a stroller is so foreign to these little girls, there is a strong possibility that they may NOT want to sit in it.

 

Oh goodness, I just don't know.  I'm trying to figure out what the best way to bring the girls home alone is going to be.  But I'm kinda going around in circles here.

What would you do if you were me?

Even though I know you're glad you're not  :)

And just because I know some of you are going to ask--no, it is not possible for Anthony to stay for the entire duration of the time.  He absolutely has to get back to work. A whole month off work is just impossible.  And I really don't know of anyone who could meet me there just to fly home with me.  We don't have a lot of family around who can help out.  It's just us.  So I just gotta do what I gotta do to bring the angels home alone. I'm not too nervous about it.  I have flown many times alone with my children, even internationally...they just don't have Down syndrome.

Let me also say that right from the beginning of this journey we have been fully aware that I would have to make the journey home alone. We have known all along that it would not be an easy task.  But opting out of the adoptions and saying NO just because I would have to come home alone with the girls has never been an option.  I know it's going to be difficult.  But it's at times like this when I know that I know that my God will NOT abandon me on the mission He has set before me.

So...any ideas, friends?  What do you think would be the easiest way for me to do this?

I really value your wisdom and input.

trying something new

I am always on the lookout for ways to save money. As a soon-to-be family of nine, I try to be as frugal as I possibly can. I consider it a privilege to be able to stay at home and raise my children. But, as many of you know, it sure does mean some changes have to be made in order to live on one income.

Over the years, as our family has continued to grow and grow and grow, I have had to learn the art of thrifty living. Gone are the days when we could afford to buy our children brand new clothes. I have learned to shop at Goodwill...and do it well. I find the most amazing bargains. I love the feeling of coming home with a whole bunch of gently used clothing, instead of a just few items had I shopped for new clothes. So rewarding.

Wherever possible, we shop used. Every now and then, if something is impossible to find used, we'll buy it new. But those times are few and far between.

God calls us to be good stewards of the things He has given us--most definitely our finances.  

So a few weeks ago I was doing our grocery shopping. Our blender had decided to call it a day. I picked one up on sale. While paying, my brand new blender lay on that conveyor belt thingymajiggy right next to my bottle of laundry detergent. As the lady scanned my goods it suddenly struck me! My laundry detergent was a complete and utter rip off. How could it be that I was paying $22.95 for laundry soap and just $12.95 for a brand new blender?  How in the world does that even work? So not right.

Forget that, I thought. I started purchasing the $12.99 laundry detergent. The results were awful. The stuff just did not do the job with my kids dirty clothes.

And so my quest began. I became a woman on a mission. There had to be a better way. Surely I could find a way to a.) save money, and b.) get our clothes clean without paying an insane amount of money.

I love to research different things. I did just that. I read and I experimented. I finally found it--a recipe to make my own laundry powder at a fraction of the cost...that works. But does it really work, you may wonder. You bet it does.

The fabulous thing is that it is so economical, and because it's super concentrated I use just a small amount in the wash. This stuff will last us a very long time. It's so easy to make, smells pretty darn good, and cleans our dirtiest clothes well.

I love a win-win situation.

The recipe is so simple.  Just four very cheap ingredients.



Grate the Ivory soap.



I grated mine pretty fine.



Add the other three ingredients in a large container.



And get some little hands involved in mixing it all together.



The kids loved helping mommy.

It's as easy as that!

Here's the recipe in case you'd like to give it a try.

12 cups of Borax (equals a 4 lb box)
8 cups baking soda (equals a 4 lb box)
8 cups washing soda
8 cups Ivory soap

Mix all the ingredients together and store in a sealed tub.

I use 1/2 a cup per load.

Do any of you make your own laundry detergent (or any other household product)?   I'd love it if you shared your recipe.

** I had never heard of washing soda before.  It look me a while to find it.  Apparently not all stores stock it.  Look in the laundry isle.  I found it right next to the Borax.

precious confirmation

Oh what a glorious day yesterday was.  I got to meet the sweetest, most adorable little girl.  I met her mommy through my blog.  They actually live in our area.

They came and spent the afternoon with us. I just knew God had a purpose in it.  Doesn't He always?

He knew it would be good for my heart.

Baby M is almost one.  Such a teeny, tiny little angel.  She is pure joy.

This little treasure has Down syndrome.  Would you believe that she is the youngest child with Down syndrome I have ever had the privilege of meeting?

I confess, recently I have been sharing my fears with my hubby.  I have shared my deepest fears--and my heavenly hopes with my love.  I have questioned my ability to raise Hailee and Harper.  I have doubted myself and wondered if I can even do this. Fear is such a miserable thing. Over the last few days Anthony has reassured me time and time again, constantly pointing me back to the ONE who has called us.

It's just one of those things that I know in my heart to be truth...but hearing it from Anthony is so reassuring.

I love that man so much!

Don't get me wrong, I am so incredibly excited to be adding these two angels to our family.  I feel so blessed that the Lord has chosen us to be their family. I constantly wonder what we ever did to deserve such a HUGE blessing.  But, there are times when I allow fear to creep into those places in my heart where I feel vulnerable.  Those places where I feel like there is no way I can ever be a good mommy to Hailee and Harper. The enemy sure does know our weaknesses, doesn't he?

Yesterday was such divine confirmation from the Father.  He brought that precious little girl into my home to show me that I CAN do this!  As I cuddled her, I felt such a reassurance...an incredible sense of knowing that I know that this IS the path He has chosen for us.  I felt such peace.  Every fear, every insecurity was gone.  Absolutely gone.

Oh my goodness, friends, today I have such an excitement in my heart.  I absolutely cannot wait to bring our sweet girls home.

Thank you, Lisa, for spending the afternoon with us...and for sharing your angel with me.  At her tender age, God is already using her. He showed me through your daughter that I CAN do this....and it will be good.  No, it will be amazing.

His goodness overwhelms me.

My arms are aching to hold them tight.

I know that there will still be those moments of fear.  I'm human, and I allow the enemy access to places in my heart where he should not be allowed. But I can honestly say that no matter what may lie ahead of us as we adopt these two children, it is going to be okay--because my God said so. 

Hallelujah!

~~~~~~

Thank you to all of you who took time to share your diaper recommendations with me.  It was so lovely to meet a few new friends too.

I have started going through some of the websites you shared with me--it's going to take some time.  I am so grateful for the advice and tips regarding using cloth diapers.

Many think I'm totally nuts to be considering this with my two little angles.  If I stop and ponder it a little too long, I put myself in that category too.  But this is something I do need to at least give a shot. If it works, great.  If not, then at least I know I tried.

Love you all.

any advice?

I am so ignorant I tell you.  Last weekend I thought I would take a peek and see how much diapers cost these days.  We have been diaper free for several years now, so I had no idea.

Geeez....you have got to be kidding me!

I may as well go and get a job at night just to afford diapers for two children.  Goodness gracious!  Someone, somewhere is making a whole lot of money because they know it is something we just have to have.

Ridiculous!

I've decided...it's going to be cloth diapers for Hailee and Harper.  Either that, or a job at night to pay the bill for disposables.

So I went on-line and tried to find out a bit more about cloth diapering.  Oh my word.

There are like fifty thousand people on the internet selling them.  And they all claim to have the latest and greatest product, of course.

Do any of you use cloth diapers?  Is there a brand that you can recommend?  I don't need the Rolls Royce of cloth diapers--just something affordable that works.

Also, do you have any great advice/tips for this novice when it comes to using cloth diapers?  I must admit, the whole idea of cloth diapering totally intimidates me. I just have never thought I have what it takes to do it...until I saw the price of disposables. I quickly changed my mind and decided that I totally could be the next queen of cloth diapering.  You bet I did.

Any advice would be so greatly appreciated.

***To my dear South African friends and family--at home it's still a nappy, here it has to be a diaper.  My poor children are so confused.

happy happy

Happy Valentines Day.

From me and my love....

To you and yours.

Hope you all had a wonderful day with the one God has blessed you with.

I sure did.

we went out today

Today we went on a little outing as a family.

By this time of year, we're longing for some warmer weather.  Can anyone relate?

But there is no warm weather in sight where we live.

So, we took a little road trip.

Not too far from home.



Anthony said, "Let's take the kids swimming outside."

I said, "You have got to be kidding me...it's 24 degrees outside."

He said, "Just you wait and see."

So we drove a short while.

And then we found it...a little piece of heaven on a freezing cold winters day.

I felt like I was on a fake beach.  I lay there, listening to the running stream, and pretending I was in Hawaii.



There was heaps of snow on the ground.  The kids played on the rocks for hours.

In 24 degree weather.

Actually, come to think of it, I believe it was really 22 degrees.



But the bitterly cold weather didn't stop them.

No way!


They all had the best time.

Just being out of the house.  On a COLD winters day. In the snow.  In Colorado.

Yep--in their bathing suits.




When the novelty of playing on the rocks wore off...

They swam...

And swam...

And swam.

For hours and hours and hours. It even snowed while we were swimming.



We had the best time today as a family.

At the hot springs.

Never in my life did I ever imagine I would wear a bathing suit, outdoors, in 20 something degree weather.

But it was fabulous. Such a fun experience.

It's quite a funny thing. When you're in that warm water it truly does feel like summer. Put one arm out of the water...and you know it's winter.

I experienced God's magnificent creation in such a new way today.  A wonderful adventure.

Hot springs.  I know the Father did that just for our pleasure.

anthony shares

I am so thankful for all the e-mails I get from sweet friends who read my blog.

There is one question I get asked ALL the time. It comes up a lot. Since it involves husbands, I have asked the man in my life to answer it from a husbands perspective.

I hope his answer encourages many of you wives who wait and wait for your husband to get on board. Or, perhaps his insight may even encourage a husband who is so afraid to say "yes."

The question so many of you ask is this:

I would so love to adopt a child.  I feel it is what the Lord is calling our family to do.  BUT my husband is not on board.  He comes up with every excuse as to why we should not do it.  What should I do?

I’m so privileged on two counts: to be able to rescue the lives of four treasured orphans and to be asked to write on my wife’s blog! I’m immensely proud of my wife.

I know that when one spouse is yearning to adopt, but the other one isn’t, we’re talking about a very emotional thing.  My heart goes out to you all.  But know that God is in control…always has been, always will be.

When a wife believes the Lord wants her family to adopt, but the husband isn’t there yet, the wife should be assured that if God wants it to happen, He’ll work on your husband’s heart.

After this spring, we will have adopted four special-needs children. In each instance, I struggled with whether this excitement in Adeye was a divine message or a divine mess. On top of that, I struggled with the possibility that God would actually speak to my wife before speaking to me first. After all, I’m the minister. Then again, if I really had to think about it, God often spoke to Adeye on many matters and left me out of the picture all together! But surely, Lord, on an issue this important, wouldn’t you at least have a dove descend on Adeye’s head and say, “This is my beloved daughter. Hear her!”?

Truth be told, God tells whomever He wants. And we need to handle it in a way that we would any other issue—trusting the God in our spouse.

So what do you do? As a couple, you pray together. The wife can show her husband from the word that orphans are STRONGLY on God’s heart. Okay. So far, so good. So you pray that the Lord would make it clear to the TWO of you what part He wants YOUR family to participate in. (Of course, you’re already convinced that God wants you to adopt, right?)

That being said, wives, a man needs a LOT of room on this one. In his mind, he knows God called him to be “head of the household” and “The Great Provider”—financially, that is. It’s natural for him to think, “How am I going to afford this?” “Will I be able to sustain a larger family financially?” “Will I love this child as if he/she were born naturally to us?” “Will everyone think I’m crazy?”

The answer to all of the above questions is yes. How will he afford it? He just will. Will he be able to sustain more kids financially? Yep. How? I don’t have a clue. But if God’s heart is for orphans, He’ll take care of you. The husband may be The Great Provider, but our God of the Universe is “The Great Sustainer.”

Will he love this child like a natural-born one? Oh my gosh. Men, you’ll love that child right off the bat. When your wife comes to you and says, “Honey, I’m pregnant,” admit it. You’re terrified and thrilled at the same time. What about finances?! Then again, what a joy! It’s the same when you first make the decision to adopt. Same questions and doubts, but soon—very soon—your heart grows in love for that “unborn” child—unborn to you. The waiting period until you get an orphan—if it’s a special-needs one—is about the same time it takes to carry a baby. About nine months. That’s God’s way of preparing you before the “baby” comes. You already love that child!

And I will say that I have experienced NO LESS excitement and joy seeing our adopted daughters in person for the first time on Gotcha Day than when our three biological sons came out of the womb!

And finally, “Will everyone think you’re crazy?” Absolutely. And isn’t that fantastic? You are officially a true Jesus Freak. And proud of it—every time you look into the eyes of the precious little life you just saved!

So wives, God has brought my heart around, as He has countless husbands around the world.  Keep heart and keep in prayer.

~~~~~

Thanks, Hon.

I don't know why the Lord so often puts the desire to adopt on the wife's heart first.  He just chooses to do it that way, I guess. I will never understand why the Lord chooses to do most of the things He does.  He's just God!

To those of you who are longing with a passion to adopt a child, or another child if you have already done it before...do not give up!  God is more than able to bring you and your hubby together on this.  He is absolutely able to knit your hearts together and make you ONE when it comes to His precious orphans.

We have definitely not always been ONE on the issue of adoption.  We have had to spend many hours on our knees before the Lord. We have had to seek His heart with everything that is within us. But you know what happened?  The Lord knit our hearts together and put in BOTH of us His heart for orphans. He brought us BOTH to a place of complete surrender.  And that's where we are today.

I can tell you that it has not been an easy road for either of us.  There were times when we felt like we could never be on the same page.  There were days when we wondered if we could ever hear the voice of the Lord clearly on this issue.  But we never gave up.  We pressed in and trusted that the Almighty would show us the way--and He did.

By no means am I an expert in this area. I can only share from my own experience, and my own journey. The best advice I could possibly give any wife who is longing--like Anthony said, is to give your hubby space.  Give him room to pray and seek God's heart.  God is so able, friends.  He can turn the coldest heart in this area.  I know He can...and He sure doesn't need our help!

He has done it in our lives--and can do it in yours.  I know that there are so many other wives who read this little blog of mine who can testify to the same thing....God CAN do it.

Do not lose heart, dear friends.  Your God is on your side.

Any other questions about our journey?  Just ask and we'll answer.

Or, if you're at that difficult place of trusting God to move on your hubby's heart, and you want someone to pray--let us know--we would be honored to pray for you, trusting for breakthrough.

Love you all.

finally some good news

I just have to share my good news with all of you, my dear bloggy friends.

The Lord Almighty has done it again! Yes He has.

Last night Anthony and I were chatting about traveling to pick up our daughters.  About timing and how it was all going to work out with the horrible mix up with our police clearance.  Having to redo the entire thing seemed like it would set us back weeks and weeks.  Our main concern is that we have already booked my Dad's ticket to fly from South Africa to come and watch our children while we're away.

We wondered how in the world things could possibly still work out for an April travel date.

We prayed together there and then...asking the Father for a miracle in this situation--which seemed so impossible.

Anthony mentioned getting help from our Congessman again.  Many of you who have journeyed with me for a while know how amazing his office was in helping us get my citizenship in a huge hurry.

This morning my hubby went to their office.  They were more than happy to put a call in to the Bureau of Investigation office on our behalf. 

The congressman's office called Anthony back just a few minutes later.  Our police clearance had already been approved and was just needing to be notarized.  That would happen today, and they will mail it back to us on Friday.  Hallelujah!

What should have taken five weeks, has taken just a few days.

The lady at Investigation told our Congressman's office, "I have on my desk the picture of these two little girls needing to come home, and I have read the letter the family wrote to us...this definitely deserves my urgent attention."

God of wonders I tell you.  No government, no red tape, no man...nothing can stand in the way of HIS plans and purposes.  Nothing!

We are so on track for an April travel date, dear friends.

Is anything impossible for the Lord Almighty?

If, like us, you're stepping out in faith and trusting the Lord for something that seems impossible in the natural, please...do not give up!  The Living God is alive and well and more than able to show us His miracle working power.

I'm starting to feel so much closer to holding Hailee and Harper in my arms.

All glory to God.

What a crazy journey to get to this point. I feel like I have aged ten years in the last seven months.

cherishing the moments

Life has been hectic.  So ridiculously crazy.  I'm trying to slow down.  Trying to enjoy every day that the Lord gives me.  One day just seems to fly into the next. Does it feel that way for you too?

Some days I wish I could stop the clock...after we bring Hailee and Harper home, of course.

We've had some welcome snow.  Did I even say that?  I am so not a lover of anything cold. I don't even like ice in my drinks. Our area has been looking so dry though. We have had a very dry winter.  Cold, but dry.  So lovely to see the land all white again.

The kids and I always marvel at the snow.  The fact that every single snowflake is different just blows my mind.  How did God even do that?  So amazing.

How can anyone dispute a creator of all things?



How?

I just don't get it.

God of wonders!



Our days are full to overflowing with togetherness.  The kids are working hard on their schoolwork.  I would love to be done with the school year by the time we have to travel to pick up Hailee and Harper.  The last thing I even want to think about is unfinished curriculum when I'm on the other side of the world.

Unfinished work will just have to wait until next year. What will it matter anyway?



I'm slowing down to savor the sweet moments with my treasures.  Making the most of these days I have with them while they are still young.  Time will pass too quickly, I'm told.  Before I know it, these sweet angels will be out of my home, pursuing all that God has for them.

Everyone tells me that day comes way too soon.



I'm cherishing the moments while I have them here in my home.

Soon life will become just a wee bit busier around here.  These five will have to adjust to having two new family members.  I'm not concerned about it.  I know the Lord has their hearts in His hands.  He'll take care of every feeling, every desire, every concern, and every tender little heart as we adjust to our new normal with Hailee and Harper.



Yes, life is about to change for these sweet blessings of mine.  But oh how God is about to multiply the love...there sure is plenty of it to go around.



It's a time of preparation in our home.

We're preparing our hearts, and our home, for our two new angels to join the crew.

I'm resting in the Lord.  In the midst of all our crazy paperwork trials, I know that He destined the day we would meet our two girls before the foundation of the earth.  I know that none of these delays (which I am so not loving) have taken the Almighty by surprise.

And so I choose to rest in His perfect timing.



By the way, the orange on my walls is seriously not that orange in real life.  The camera just did that, and I don't know how to change it.  Just in case you thought I must be completely strange to live with walls that glow!

~~~~~

I'm letting my dear hubby loose here on my blog tomorrow night.  He's going to answer the one question so many of you write and ask me.  He's the perfect one to answer it!  Why?  Because he's living proof that prayer works...and that God is more than able to turn the coldest heart in this one particular area.

And, he's just a fabulous writer too. I always wonder why I'm the blogger, and he's not. 

~~~~~

Sally, could you please e-mail me, friend.  [email protected]

an overdue update

Sorry to keep you all waiting on our adoption update.  Thank you to everyone who has asked about what is happening.

If you read my post last Wednesday, you will already know that our police clearance was the wrong one we needed for our dossier. The girl's country said NO!  It turns out that we had been issued a police clearance from the wrong department. Initially we thought it would be an easy fix. But is anything that involves government departments ever easy?

We all know the answer to that question.

Anthony drove to their office two hours away and begged them to PLEASE help us out. I got on the phone and begged them to help us.  Our social worker also phoned and begged and pleaded.  We did an insane amount of begging last Wednesday.

Every single plea fell on deaf ears. The government would not budge. They would NOT reissue the correct document...even though they already had our fingerprints in their computer system.  Nice.

The one and only way around the disaster was for us to go through the entire police clearance application again. We rushed over to our local police station on Wednesday evening and got refingerprinted.  The application was sent overnight to Denver on Thursday morning.

Together with our application, we sent a hand-written note explaining the mix up and asking for them to please expedite the process. Then we prayed with all our hearts...that the application would fall into the hands of someone compassionate. Such a similar situation to the one we had here.

Now we wait. The average time it takes to receive police clearances back is five weeks.  Oh my goodness, that would be such a huge setback. We are still praying for an April travel date.

We're standing in the gap again, friends, trusting for the Father to move yet another mountain on our behalf.  Easy for Him, right?

In my heart of hearts I know that the victory will be HIS. I know that this is just another opportunity for God to get ALL the glory.

Truthfully though, I cannot wait to get past the paperwork.  I just feel so weary from all the changes that have had to be made to our dossier.  I know it is all part of adoption.  But this has been so much more challenging than our first two Chinese adoptions.  I guess it just feels harder because we had to get through my citizenship paperwork in addition to adoption paperwork.  By no means has it been an easy ride.

We're pressing in and pressing on...trusting the Lord with all our hearts as we journey to bringing our precious angels home. We did not give up in the beginning when it looked next to impossible that we could ever adopt Hailee...and we're not about to give up now.

The enemy is defeated!

While I wait, I'm in nesting mode. I feel like I'm pregnant and need to start getting ready for the arrival of twins.  I have so much I need to do.  Both the girls will be so tiny, and we did not keep any baby stuff.  Never thought we would ever go back to the baby stage again.  We're starting all over. Cribs, a double stroller, high chairs, baby toys, diapers. Oh my goodness...best I start shopping.

I have absolutely no idea what size Hailee and Harper will be, so I probably need to wait on buying the clothes. What will they eat?  Will they drink out of bottles?  Will they even know how to eat solid food? Can Harper sit on her own, or walk? I know Hailee won't be able to do either. So many things I just don't know.

Thank you for your love, and your support. It means the absolute world to me.

I CANNOT do it!

For every single person who asks me every single day how in the world I am going to 'manage' my life with my two new daughters...you are so right...I absolutely CANNOT be a good mommy to two children with Down Syndrome.  Gosh, and the thought of taking care of Hailee and Harper in addition to my other five...you're right again.  It is absolutely impossible.

I am flawed.

I am weak.

I am frail.

I struggle. 

I fail too darn often.

I lose my patience.

I reach the end of my rope.

 I wonder how I will ever get through some days, and some situations.

There is absolutely no way I can do this....

...on my own!

But here's the thing. To everyone who feels the need to ask me how in the world I am going to do this--let me tell you that I can do NOTHING in my own strength. Nothing. From the time my feet hit the ground in the morning, until the time I fall into bed night...I am filled to overflowing with HIS perfect strength.

How am I going to manage?  I'm not.  Because I no longer live as I used to.  It is only through being filled with the Holy Spirit daily, and the absolute surrender of my entire life to God, that I am able to truly say that "I CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

It's just that simple.

HE enables me.

It is with absolute confidence that I can say that my God will not abandon me on the mission He has set before me.

Onward...with all my flaws, my faults, my fears...and MY GOD!

~~~~~~

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for all the very precious birthday messages.  They mean the absolute world to me.  Thank you for journeying with me, sweet friends.

thirty eight

Today is my birthday.  Thirty eight.  But I still feel eighteen. How did I even get to thirty eight so fast?

Crazy. 

It has been a blessed day.  My family spoiled me.  I feel so incredibly loved.

But truthfully, I feel so disheartened about our adoption paperwork. Discouraged...but not defeated! I just cannot wait to see the end of it all.  I feel like we have been in battle since day one.

The Lord has been so good to me today--He has breathed peace into my weary heart.  It is all good.

I absolutely cannot wait to see two more beauties in these family pics this time next year.  My last birthday ever as a mommy of five.

There are truly no words to express the love in my heart for this man. Wow, I am finally as old as he was the day we met.  Funny.



The leader of the pack.  My first born treasure.  The one who showed me that being a mother is what I was called to be.



My Chinese beauties.  The girls who planted the seed of adoption in my heart.



"I prayed for this child and the Lord has granted me the desire of my heart" 1 Sam 1:27

The baby I dreamed of having for two years.  My littlest angel.



The joy of my heart.  My tender sweetheart.  My second born mighty warrior.



How blessed I am.  Thank you Lord Jesus for thirty eight years of life--and for these whom you have blessed me with.

Thank you for all the sweet words of encouragement, and the prayers yesterday. They mean the absolutely world to me. I will update tomorrow about our paperwork, and where things stand.

would you please pray?

Oh my goodness gracious, friends. We could seriously do with your prayers today.  We have hit another roadblock in our adoptions.

Obstacles are great opportunities for God to MOVE...right?

Well, we really need Him to move on our behalf today. 

We have found out that Hailee and Harper's country has rejected our police clearance.  They will not accept it as it is not issued by the correct department.

Oh my!

I have spent hours on the phone. Hours! Anthony has personally gone to their offices here in CO today. We're trying to find another way of doing our police clearances...one that will be acceptable to this country so that they will allow us to go and get our children.

Just another opportunity for the Father to show His amazing faithfulness, I guess.

I just don't know how in the world we are going to get around this one. But He does.  And I guess that's all I really need to know.

Thank you so much for your prayers.  I don't want my daughters to spend one day longer in an orphanage than is absolutely necessary.  Hailee, in particular, needs to come home soon.  Like yesterday.

Thank you for standing with me and trusting that this too shall give God ALL the glory.

If there is one thing I am sure of, it is that God has NOT brought us this far only to abandon us now.  No way.

And so I'll say it again, "Mountain be MOVED!"

** For those of you who are unfamiliar with adoption--a police clearance is a necessary document in a dossier.  Non-negotiable.

like precious gold

Do you ever look at your life and just feel so immensely blessed?

I sure do.

Anthony and I have been exceedingly, abundantly blessed.  We have both had the amazing privilege of being able to travel.  A lot.  Anthony spent years traveling the world as an international model.  His job took him to many exotic and beautiful places.  While modeling in the fashion capitals of the world, he also had the wonderful privilege of taking people on mission trips.  Yes, models sure can be Christians too. It's not easy, but it is do-able.

I, on the other hand, never had the modeling genes happening. At all! My life as a twenty-something had me feeling restless and eager to see the world.  And so I did.  I traveled a lot before marriage--seeing something like thirty countries. It was a fun time.

Then the Lord brought us together.  I met Anthony when he came to South Africa as a missionary in 1996.  We lived in Africa for five years after being married, and then moved to Australia, then to Virginia, then to Colorado.  And here we are now.

You know the thing that really stands out for me?  Not the great places I have seen, nor the different foods I have tried.  Neither is it the stunning scenery, nor the variety of languages I have heard spoken.  No...the true treasure lies in the people we have met on the journey.  Amazing people.  As we have moved and traveled, we have gained the most incredible friendships along the way.  People who we know will be friends for life.  Friends who live on different continents--but are never far from our hearts and thoughts. Thank the Lord for e-mail.

What a blessing friendships are. I have come to treasure them like precious gold.

When I started blogging eighteen or so months ago, I never imagined that God would use this little blog to bless my life so richly with amazing friendships.  Anthony always teases me that some of my dearest friends are here in blog world.  People I have never even met in person.  I guess it is kind of funny.  The internet, though wicked in so many ways, certainly has made the world a much smaller place.

Last Saturday I had the absolute privilege of meeting a sweet bloggy friend. Kristin and I met through her best friend, a precious woman of God who has been a dear blog friend of mine for ages.  I don't even know when Lisa and I 'met' here.  But I sure am thankful we did.  Lisa has been such a treasure to me--always encouraging me and pointing me toward the Father.

Kristin and I had a few hours together last Saturday, and what a sweet time is was.  Of course we talked non-stop, as only women can do...such a gift from above!

I was so blessed to be able to spend such special moments with Kristin.  She and her hubby have one little angel girl with Down Syndrome, and are soon going to be heading to the same country as Hailee and Harper to adopt another.  Yep--that seed of adoption is planted in their hearts.  Such a beautiful thing.  I can hardly wait to see how the Lord leads and guides them in the months and years to come.

Thank you, Kristin, for taking the time to visit with me on your vacation.  I was truly blessed. You are like precious gold, my friend.

Thank you, dear bloggy friends, for journeying with me.  It truly has been such a treat to get to know so many of you.  You have inspired me to become a better mom, a better wife, and a better servant of the Lord Jesus Christ.  I appreciate every comment you leave me, and every e-mail you send me.  You are true treasures in the Kingdom of God...like precious gold.

she CANNOT be left behind

Thank you for sharing in our joy as we add another precious treasure to our family.  Fearfully and wonderfully made--Harper is perfect!

And what a perfect addition she is going to be to our family.  Like her sister, she is loved and treasured already, even though we have never laid eyes on her. 

We first saw a picture of Harper last June.  It was on the same day we saw Hailee's picture.  They were together--the two of them staring at us from our computer screen.  Two. Together. 

We started feeling the Lord stirring our hearts, and so we began to pray.  I mentioned before that we pretty much knew instantly that we were meant to adopt Hailee. That was a given.  But what about the other little treasure?

Truthfully, we just didn't know.  Or maybe we did--but were afraid to acknowledge it.  Perhaps we were allowing fear to dictate. Or maybe, in all our human-ness, we considered all the reasons why we should not adopt two, instead of only considering what our Father in heaven was calling us to do. Perhaps we have known all along what we needed to do--but it just seemed like such an enormous thing to get our heads around.

I don't know.  We're flawed and human. We stumble and fall. We get up again. We doubt. We get fearful. We take our eyes off Jesus. We consider the potential consequences...instead of only seeing the blessing.  We mess up more times than we care to admit.

So. Darn. Human.

It was around that time of searching, that the Lord gave me a scripture in Psalm.  For the life of me, I could not understand it. I read it over and over and could not figure out why in the world the Lord would give me that scripture.  I was one seriously confused chick I tell you.

We knew a child's life was on the line.  We know the statistics all too well.  We know the sad realities of children with Down Syndrome in foreign orphanages.  We know the truth about the mental institutions they are sent too. Still, we just did not know what to do.  Duh!

The little girl in the pink clothes and with the bald head would NOT go away. Trust me, we tried.  We tried to run from the voice of the Lord.  We tried to give Him all our completely lame, pitiful excuses.  We tried to tell Him about the plans we had, and the the things we just had to do with our lives.

Yeah, like that worked.

Over the weeks and months, the little girl in pink crept into our hearts a little more with each passing day.  Every time we looked at her, we saw her WITH Hailee.  That was when the Lord began to speak louder than before.  Yep--sometimes we are just so daft that we need Him to start yelling at us.  And He did!

"This adoption is for Hailee!"

"This child cannot be separated from Hailee!" 

"Hailee NEEDS this child.  Not another child...THIS child."

"This child will be Hailee's soul mate."

"Are you listening now, Salems?  YOU GO!"

"Okay, Okay, Father...we get it."

We finally started listening, friends.  God got us to the point where we realized that adding this little girl to our family would not be about us--but about her sister, sweet Hailee.  We realized that if we left her behind in the orphanage, we would be doing Hailee such an injustice.  We finally got it, that the Lord always intended for these two children to be together...since the foundation of the earth.  

The truth is that we don't fully understand what the Lord has in store for them, or why they cannot be separated.  We really don't have all the answers.  But that's okay.  The only thing we are sure of is that one cannot be left behind.  They are inseparable!

Then, finally, as I pondered the scripture the Lord had given me, it started to make sense.

"The stone that the builders rejected
has become the capstone;
the Lord has done this,
and it is marvelous in our eyes."

                         Psalm 118:22-23

Finally, friends...finally I began to understand!  A "capstone' or 'keystone' was a crucial stone used to secure a foundation of a building.  It was often the primary stone used to hold up an arch.  It was an absolutely necessary stone.  Without it, the entire building would collapse.  It would come crumbling down.

Harper is the KEYSTONE in Hailee's life!  She is absolutely necessary in Hailee's foundation.  Harper, once rejected by her biological family, will become a chief building block in her sister's life.  No longer a 'rejected stone', God's plans for her are simply amazing...in our family, and in her sister's life.

And that, my dear blog readers, is why there is absolutely no way that we could ever leave Harper behind.  The two girls cannot be separated.  There is no way.  The Lord Almighty has spoken.  Our only responsibility was to say "yes" (even though it took a while to get to that point)...we'll leave the rest to Him. He really does do all things well!

God has a plan and a purpose for this little angel.  She will NEVER be rejected again. What a beautiful blessing she is going to be to her sister....a foundational stone.



I know that many of you who have adopted children can testify to this...that God puts children in families very purposefully and strategically.  He knows who need to be with whom, and which children need each other.  We have seen it in our own lives with Hannah-Claire and Haven.  My goodness, I don't know what Haven would do without her sister--who is her voice.  They are amazing together.

Sometimes the journey's God calls us to take may not be the easiest.  Sometimes they will take every single ounce of faith we have.  But no matter what the road ahead may look like, no matter what hardships may lie around the corner for our family--this little angel is our daughter--she is Hailee's much-needed sister...and she CANNOT be left behind!