rolling with the times

How can I ever thank you all enough for your prayers, support and encouragement as we fight to bring Hailee home. We may not know much more than we did 5 days ago--but we do know one thing--we're giving it all we've got!

I have realized something. There is one thing common in every single country around the world--first world, third world or in between world. When you deal with government departments it is always the same. You spend hours pressing buttons in an attempt to try and reach a human. And when you eventually do, well, they either have no idea how to answer your question, OR they refer you to another person--and then you begin the whole, glorious process of waiting again. Such joy.

Oh, and while I'm letting out all my frustrations on my blog. Can somebody please tell me why in the world the answering machine and voice mail were ever created? I have no idea. You can leave ten messages, or be on the brink of some serious disaster in your life...and still no-one calls you back. Baffling.

Soooo, I seriously needed a break--time out from all the stuff we're dealing with. It got me down. My dear hubby thought of the perfect pick-me-up. "Let's take the boys to get a haircut, Honey."

Great idea hon, the perfect stress reliever.

Not!

Our boys are so wonderful, and for the most part, very easy going. EXCEPT when it comes to getting their hair cut. For some reason they, like most boys, have decided that the longer, the better. That cool means having it hanging right in front of your eyes so that you have to squint to see where you're going. One had to have his longer locks pasted, and I mean pasted to his forehead. The other preferred the messy, just got out of bed look. Oh, and baby boy--he just tags a along and falls into the patterns of big brothers.

The time had come! We dragged them kicking and screaming to the hairdresser. The ultimate stress reliever for every worn out mom.

The end result--so much better.



Mmmm--I saw my big brothers be so mad about having this done. Does this face look mad enough? I love it--he has totally perfected the pout.



Oh Daddy, you have your camera--let me just pretend that I am so okay with this.



Needless to say, they wore hats the entire day because they were concerned people would think they looked dorky. Huh?

Oh my--how times have changed. When I was their age I didn't give a toss what I looked like. Lord have mercy--I can't even imagine what it's like having teenage boys. I always thought my girls would be the ones so concerned about the way they looked. But I'm beginning to think I may have that the wrong way around.

Or maybe I just need to get my head out of the 80's and finally get it--times are so different. You KNOW you're getting older when your ten year old son says, "Mom, was there TV when you were a kid?" Or, while watching a pioneer-type movie, "Mom, did you wear clothes like that when you were young?"

Holy cow, they think I'm from an entirely different era.

stand up and fight!

**** If you did not read my post yesterday--go and read it before this one.

Sorry friends, I really did not mean to keep you all hanging today. I totally laughed at some of your comments. You guys are too funny. Truth is, I wrote and wrote until my eyes couldn't stay open anymore. The rest just had to wait till today. Sorry. It was kind of fun though :)

So, now that I have kept you all in suspense the entire day--I'll fill you in on where we are with things.

By the time last Friday morning came, I was a mess. I now have such an understanding of what so many families go through when they fall in love with a child--only to find out he/she cannot be theirs. Goodness, I felt like I was losing OUR CHILD.

Our main obstacle is obviously my citizenship. So many times over the last couple of years my dear hubby has tried to convince me to get my US citizenship. Every time I blow him off--it means I have to lose one of my other citizenships (South African or Australian), plus the exam that you have to take is seriously intense. My knowledge of American history is very sad. So, I never pursued it. Of course now I am kicking myself for not looking into it a long time ago.

On Friday I almost gave in to hopelessness. I came so close to feeling overwhelmed to the point of just wanting to give up. So close. Every e-mail I got seemed to hold more bad news--more and more obstacles that stood in our way. Goodness, there just seemed to be one thing after another.

After many hours on the computer and the phone, the Spirit of the living God rose up in my heart. I realized that it IS possible for me to get my citizenship. The Lord had to give me a swift kick in the rear. I found out that the 'normal' process could take anywhere from 9-12 months. Oh no--Hailee may not have that long, she is not doing well. She is [barely] living with a severe heart defect that has not been repaired. She NEEDS surgery...or she will die.

Then we found out that there is a way to get my citizenship expedited. It could take just a couple of months from beginning to end. We have to apply to USCIS (Immigration) for my application to be expedited. They grant it based on need. We will apply based on a humanitarian need.

Learning that there IS a way for the Immigration side of things to be sorted out, I finally saw the glimmer of hope that we so needed.

But, we're not in the clear yet. We're still waiting to find out if there is a loophole regarding the financial issue. It is the craziest thing to me. We may have found a way around it--but are not 100% sure yet.

Then there is another paperwork issue. The country Hailee is in requires that Anthony and I include an original marriage license in our dossier. One wee problem--we were married in South Africa. There is no way on God's green earth that I am going to get a copy of our marriage license from South Africa. Even if you live there--dealing with home affairs is no fun at all. A visit to their offices is a nightmare for everyone. No kidding. To try and get it from here--oh my, I can stand on my head and whistle dixie till the cows come home--it's not gonna happen.

It may be possible to give them a copy of the original marriage license we have in our possession, like we did for our China adoptions. But, this country is seriously strict about their paperwork, so there is no telling what they will say. We're trusting for favor.

The journey has been filled with highs and lows. It feels like we have faced mountain after mountain since the day we agreed to adopt this sweet little girl. From opposition and sheer disinterest from friends and family, to all the legal stuff, well, it has been a ride.

To get my citizenship is going to cost thousands of dollars extra. It's going to take time and effort. The extra paperwork to do a "single person with consent" adoption is going to take more time and more effort. But you know what--Hailee is worth it! She is worth every single little bit of effort that we have to put into this adoption.

She is worth it.

Sometimes the journey's that the Lord sends us on are not without trials. They are not without obstacles that stand in our way. There are times that the Lord has us stand up and FIGHT for the things He has birthed in our hearts. This is one such time for us.

We will not give up on Hailee.

We will not let the enemy have the victory here--another child left to die in an orphanage.

We will not grow weary of the battle.

We will not!

We're standing up and fighting for Hailee...because she's worth it!

Some things in this life are just worth fighting for.

faith like a mustard seed

How can I ever thank you all enough for your prayers?

Sorry I did not give any details about what we are up against with Hailee's adoption. It just all seemed so crazy, and truthfully, I could not find the words. Thank you for all the very kind comments and e-mails assuring me of your prayers. I appreciate it so very much.

In a nutshell. On Wednesday morning I woke up to an e-mail telling me that there was a 99% chance that we would not be able to bring Hailee home. This was after I so clearly spelled out our situation before we agreed to adopt her. But, I know that our case is so unusual, and so it was easy to overlook certain things. I completely understood...but was absolutely crushed.

The country that Hailee is in requires that there be no more than 45 years between parent and child. That disqualifies Anthony, but not me. They would allow me to adopt her as a 'single person with consent from my husband'. No problem. Or so we thought.

Then we had the issue of me being a non-US citizen. Again, no problem I was told. Not! As the main petitioner for the adoption, getting the required visa to bring Hailee into the USA would be impossible. You see, the IR3 visa (which is what all orphans are brought into the country on) cannot be issued to a non-citizen. Dilemma number two.

Our problems had only just begun. Even if I could, by some miracle, get another type of visa issued that I could bring Hailee home on, we still had another problem. Money! As a 'single petitioner' they look at MY income. Holy moley--many of you know all to well how much money we stay at home moms earn. Yes, that would be a big zero. Nothing. No money in the bank in my name to prove that I can support a child...not to mention the other 5 kiddos at home.

I know, I know. It is all so ridiculous. I mean, for heavens sakes, they would see that I am married. And they would see that my husband has an income because we have to prove it in our dossier. So many of you understand this--they make the process to adopt a child so darn difficult! I will never understand it.

Needless to say, on Wednesday morning I was in a frenzy. I had no idea which way to turn. I could not find any place to get help. I started calling attorneys, but I never got further than the receptionist. If I wanted advice on the phone--I had to pay $200 for a 45 minute consultation. Oh my freaking goodness, all I wanted to know was whether someone could help us--just a simple yes, or no would be good. I did not need a 45 minute consultation! I just needed someone to give me a glimmer of hope in the midst of what seemed like an impossible situation.

I began to sob uncontrollably...things were spiraling downward before my eyes, and I just could not see any hope in it all. I was absolutely heartbroken. I looked at Hailee's picture and before me was not just any child--darn it, she was OUR child. Nothing made sense. Here was OUR daughter lying in a crib in a third world country--so frail and so weak that we are concerned she will not even be alive in the next six months--and all I was hearing was, "There must be another child, in another country that God intends for you to bring home, this is not going to work out for you." Actually, no! There is no other child that God has told us to adopt. And, God has NOT closed the door to this adoption yet!

God gives us husbands for a reason. Two ARE better than one. My dear hubby remained calm through the entire day--always pointing me toward Christ and constantly reassuring me that God is faithful. My faith felt like it was hanging on a thread--just barely there. So much smaller than a mustard seed.

Phew.

Want to know what the Almighty God did? Is there any possible way we can bring Hailee home? It seems absolutely impossible...but is it really?

Well, I guess you'll just have to read tomorrow.

URGENT, please!

Friends---we so desperately need your prayers today, please.

The last 24 hours have been so tough. We have run into unforeseen mountains that stand before us, having us believe that there is no way we can possibly bring Hailee home. It seems as if it is going to take miracle.

Here's the thing--we believe in miracles. We believe that God is the same yesterday, today and forever. We believe that the miracles of the Bible are the same miracles He performs today. We believe.

We are walking by faith and not by sight. We're standing on the promises of God--trusting that He will make a way through all the red tape we are dealing with. A tiny little girl is lying in a crib in Eastern Europe--waiting, waiting waiting for a family. She will surely die if no-one comes. My heart is breaking.

Please pray that we can find a way. Any way. There absolutely has to be a way to bring her home. We're seeking with all our hearts, trusting God to lead us to the right people who may be able to help.

I'll share more later. Just know that there is a battle raging. A battle for a little girls life. We can choose to say, "Oh no, this can never work out for us, there are too many things against us." Or, we can choose to rise up with faith in our hearts and fight for this child. That's exactly what we're doing.

If anyone reading this knows of a knowledgeable adoption lawyer who would be willing to speak to me, please can you pass their details on to me via e-mail? [email protected]. I need some advice ASAP.

Thank you so much for standing with us in prayer today. We appreciate it more than you will ever know.

More later....

Adeye

PLEASE go and read this!

Oh goodness, friends--please would you go over to Linny's blog and read about an urgent need. Linny writes about it so much better than I ever could--so I'll let you hear about it from her. This is one of those times when the prayers of the Body of Christ are so urgently needed.

My heart breaks--I just cannot imagine.

Please consider getting involved in what Linny is organizing. Please!

help...got any ideas?

** UPDATE

I am so overwhelmed by all of the responses I have had. Thank you to all of you who are sharing your amazing ideas with me. Things I would never have thought of. Thank you for all the e-mails and comments. My inbox is full with many wonderful ideas. Thank you for the offers of donations for an on-line fundraiser. I feel so loved. I am so overwhelmed by your outpouring of love...again. I cannot stop the tears--how high, how wide and how deep is the love that God has for this sweet little girl who so desperately needs to come home soon.

Thank you for being used by the Father to show me His love, His care and His concern for Hailee today. Thank you for being His hands and feet. My heart is so encouraged.

Please know that I am so grateful for each and every one of you.


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Dearest friends---I seriously need some help in a hurry here.

When we adopted from China twice, it was a piece of cake. For both girls we had a year to fundraise. And, generous grants from various organizations made our task even easier.

This time is a whole new story. The process for Hailee's country is quick. We're estimating between 5 and 6 months and she will be home. That's wonderful considering she NEEDS to come home quickly. But oh my word--so much less time to try and raise an insane amount of money.

As with most adoptions I know of--this is all by faith. Stepping out of the boat and trusting the Lord to meet us on the water. Who in the world has $24 000.00 just lying around to pay the bills that just keep coming (and coming, and coming) when you adopt a child? Nope--not us.

We're in brainstorming mode. Yeah, we could (and will) apply for grants again. But, most of them have already granted us twice before. Will it be a case of, "Oh no, it's them again?" We have been told that we were extremely 'lucky' to receive grants a second time. We call it blessed.

Ug, the great ideas are just not coming this time. I don't even know if I have a brain for this stuff anymore. Actually, some most days I don't know if I have any brain left at all...I am constantly in mommy-mode. Know the feeling?

Can anyone help us out? Have you, or someone you know, held a successful fundraiser? Would you mind sharing your ideas with us? We would be so grateful. I know that others in the process of adopting their children, and who read my blog, could also benefit from the ideas you share...we're all in this together.

Just leave a comment and share your idea--no matter how big, or small.

Thank you, bloggy friends. Any ideas you could share would be so hugely appreciated. We're racing against time here and have to start coming up with a few great fundraisers...quickly.

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Thank you to everyone who has ordered a hair bow, or two, from Kelly. Her fundraiser to benefit Hailee's adoption ends on Wednesday. If you are still interested in ordering, please stop by her website here and place your order before the end of the day on Wednesday.

Kelly has blessed us more than we could ever ask--we are so thankful for her help, and her heart to serve the Father wherever He leads her.

Be blessed, precious friends. Thank you for your love and your support as we journey, in faith, to bring Hailee home. We love and appreciate you.

the honest scrap award

I love the name of this award. Who in the world thinks up the names of these things?

I was so blessed to receive this award from my sweet bloggy friend, Christy. I am so thankful for Christy's friendship--and for the fact that she feels the things I ramble on about are even worthy of an award. Seriously, I often wonder why I even do this. I don't consider myself a writer of any sorts--I almost flunked English in High School. Hated it. But, here I am--living my life, and writing about it for you all to read. Can only be God.

Thank you, Christy, for the award. Thank you for reading my blog and for your constant encouragement. Thank you for being so faithful to stop by, drop me a note and let me know that you're praying for me. I appreciate it so much.

So, here goes--these are the rules.

1) say thanks and give a link to the presenter of the award.

2) share "ten honest things" about myself.

3) present this award to 7 others whose blogs I find brilliant in content and/or design, or those who have encouraged me.

4) tell those 7 people that they've been awarded HONEST SCRAP and inform them of these guidelines in receiving it.


Ten honest things about me:

1.) I have traveled and lived in many places around the world (about 30 countries). Some before marriage, some after. I feel blessed to have seen so many wonderful places.

2.) I absolutely have to take a bath before I go to bed--I don't care how late it is. Non-negotiable!

3.) I love being barefoot...it's the African in me.

4.) Even in summer, I have to sleep with at least two covers over me. I think my dear hubby is convinced I'm a reptile.

5.) Worship is my best thing ever. I could worship God all day long.

6.) I think snow so pretty--for one day, then I'm over it.

7.) When I met my husband, I wondered how I could ever feel secure being married to man who was a former international model (Anthony was in the top 20 male models in the world). But, he has made me feel like his queen from day one. I am truly blessed.

8.) If I had to pray for God to give me one ability that I do not have, it would be to sing. I wish I could sing.

9.) If I'm passionate about something...you'll probably know it!

10.)At the end of my life I hope I can look back and know with certainty that I lived my life on purpose--making each day count as if it were my last.

Now for the fun part--I get to give the award away to seven friends. I love giving things away.

1.) Lee-Anne--a friend in real life. We met years ago when we lived in South Africa. One of the sweetest people I know. She loves God with all her heart. I have never heard her complain once--about anything! So precious.

2.) Janine--another friend in real life! She lives in my home town in South Africa. One of my most treasured friends on this earth. There are no words to describe the blessing this girl is to me. I miss her something awful.

3.) Holly--a new bloggy friend. I love her heart--for her family and for orphans. She has just said goodbye to her hubby who is serving our country overseas. I admire her so much, I cannot imagine how tough that must be.

4.) Rachel--One of my dearest friends in real life. I miss her terribly. They are working on their paperwork to adopt their second child. I can hardly wait to see who God has chosen to be their next blessing. Love her heaps.

5.) Laura--another friend in real life. This friend is an amazing writer. I love the way she shares her heart on her blog. I love her honesty as she shares her ups and downs. I am so blessed to have her in my life.

6.) Lori--a new bloggy friend. I love her blog so much. I love her humor, she makes me smile even on the days that seem hard. They are waiting to travel to adopt their second daughter.

7.) Linny--I have been reading Linny's blog for about 7 months. An amazing woman of God. Fifty years old and still bringing precious orphans home--she is surrounded by little ones and loves it. Her journey inspires me to live a life out of the box.


I consider myself incredibly blessed to know each one of these woman--either in real life, or through my blog. Stop by and meet them--you will be so glad you did.

pure joy

Phew, friends. I never imagined that my post here would open up such a can of worms. My inbox is flooded with e-mails from amazing people sharing their trials, their heartaches and their road to forgiveness after close friends and family have let them down by not supporting the call on their lives to adopt a child. Truthfully, I read the comments, the e-mails, and ponder the things that we personally are dealing with, and my heart just cannot comprehend it. Like I said in my post, I always heard stories of this kind of rejection, but I never imagined it to be so common, so 'normal.' It truly breaks my heart.

This week sure has had its challenges. Oh, the comments we get...you gotta love it. Like this, from a woman my hubby works with...

Anthony: "We're going to Eastern Europe to adopt a four year old little girl with Down Syndrome...she is not doing well and we really need to get there as soon as possible."

Woman: "Oh...you know, when you adopted Haven it was all very exciting. But Anthony, when is this all going to end?"

Huh?

Oh, and I love how many people tell us that we need to do everything in our power to try and find a family in Hailee's country to come and take her into foster care. What in the world? Do they not understand how detrimental that would be (even after we explain it)? Do they not get it when we tell them that she will surely die if that were to happen? Do they not get it that we are talking about extreme poverty--to the point where they cannot even feed themselves, let alone another child. Oh, and that any money the government pays them to foster a child goes to alcohol and that's why they take the orphans! That is a fact. We could talk till we're blue in the face--they just don't get it.

And by the way--if one more person feels the need to tell me that there are so many orphans in this country, and that we should adopt one from here I think I'm going to scream. Trust me on this one thing, if God wants us to adopt from America, He is more than able to tell us that...and we have ears wide open to hear Him. But this brings me to another point: God often puts passion in us. If you got the passion, you got the mission. Go for it.

People often ask us what to say when we get asked all these questions. The answer? Nothing. For one, there simply are no answers that would make any difference at all. And secondly, God is our advocate. He is more than able to fight our battles. Getting into conversations that people have no understanding of is just completely futile.

"The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned" (1 Corinthians 2:14).

I could go on and on sharing some of the ridiculous things we hear daily. But, it does not matter. My eyes and ears have been so opened to the things that so many of you are dealing with or have dealt with. And it breaks my heart. It should not be this way. I have no idea whoever gave people the right to tell me (or anyone else) how big my family should be. Whoever decided how many children is enough? Or how many children is the right number? Only the Almighty! He is the only one who has permission in our lives to lead and guide us in this.

I will say that I find it so very interesting that every single time we come up against people who are unsupportive of what we are doing--they are those who have never adopted a child before. Never adopted, never fostered, never even helped out an orphan--but they feel the need to tell us what to do, or in our case, what not to do. Go figure!

To the rest of the world, we may seem like complete fools. And that is perfectly okay. The comments bounce off us like water off a duck's back. Nothing penetrates, try as they may.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers (and sisters) whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance" (James 1:2).

We're finding the joy in it all. Our joy comes from knowing that someday soon we will hold this broken little being, she will have a new name (which means Heroine), she will be loved and treasured like there is no tomorrow, she will receive every bit of medical care that she so desperately requires, she will be surrounded by brothers and sisters to love on her, she will know that the words "Mommy" and "Daddy" translate as "love." Most importantly, she will know the love of Jesus--the one who promised in His Word that He would come for her--and He did! Yes, pure joy.

On another note, I am counting my blessings after a crazy week. Like these darlings of mine. They're like their mother--longing for the beach. So what do you do when you have a boat but no beach?

Blow the thing up, fill it with water, and pretend. And then, like we say where I come from "Bob's your Uncle." Or, in normal English--everything's great!



How blessed I am.

overwhelmed--by His love... and yours

Oh my goodness---I am so overwhelmed by the love you all showered on me when I shared my heart yesterday. I am so touched by each and every nugget of wisdom, experience and encouragement from the Lord you all shared with me. It really was like cool water poured out on a thirsty land. The Father knew I needed to hear it in the midst of such an emotional time.

Of course the enemy would love to see us defeated, questioning our decision to bring Hailee home and surrounded by a cloud of doubt. But no way, sweet friends. We are rising up with increased determination and passion. I have realized something about the comments that many of you shared. There is a common thread that runs through what you said--this is a spiritual battle we are up against for the lives of these children. The battle for orphans is a very real thing. Those who step out and do it come up against such opposition. I have even read countless stories of people coming up against opposition from their CHURCHES! Lord have mercy.

In the last few weeks I have received so many amazing e-mails from people who have it in their hearts to adopt a child. A supernatural birthing in their hearts of the desire to add to their families through the blessing that is adoption. And while they are so eager to get the process going--there seem to be never ending obstacles that stand in their way. Yes--the battle rages.

Does it surprise us that so many people face such hardships as they step out to be obedient to do what God has TOLD them to do? Not at all. As Anthony and I have traveled and ministered in various places around the world, we have learned one thing--that when we step out in faith and do something the Father tells us to do, we WILL [not maybe, not perhaps, not kind of] come up against opposition. No doubt about it. It happens every single time. Is it some coincidence that unforeseen obstacles and mountains stand in our way, seemingly preventing us from fulfilling the will of God? Absolutely NOT. The enemy is subtle, friends. He comes to steal, kill and destroy--and that includes every plan, every purpose, every dream and every desire God has breathed into your heart. It's time to protect the things the Almighty tells us to do--protect them with a passion.

I believe with all my heart that there is a mighty wave flowing across the Church--many are stepping out in faith and pursuing adoption. But, it is not without sacrifice. Here's the thing--there is always a price to pay when we follow Jesus with all our hearts, serving Him with reckless abandon. There is a cost--and many of you have counted that cost, as you shared with me. But, the rewards we seek are not earthly treasures or affirmation from man (or family). I have honestly come to a place in my life where, if I loose every single person I am close to simply because they cannot accept the call on our lives--well, so be it. I cannot help that. I would much rather be faithful to my God, than give in to what people in my life feel is the 'right' thing for me and my family. Friends, there will always be a cost to following Jesus--but He paid the ultimate price, made the ultimate sacrifice just for me--so why can't I do it for Him?


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Now for something completely different...

Through the amazing (and very small) world that is blogging, some time ago I met the most wonderful person who has become a sweet friend. Kelly is one seriously gifted mommy. She makes the most awesome girly hair bows. Good heavens, I look at her creations and wonder 'how in the world does she do that?' Not only is she a very gifted SAHM, but she also has such a passion for the waiting children of the world and cannot wait to add to her family through adoption. What a blessing she is.

Kelly is on a mission to help us bring Hailee home. The Lord spoke to her heart. All the profits that she makes off her orders until July 22 will go to our adoption fund. How amazing is that? I am so deeply touched that God would tell her to do that for us.



Kelly's on-line store is called Girly Girl Bowtique. If you feel led, would you consider supporting Kelly...and us? If you have girls, go and have a look at the stunning things Kelly makes. She even made a little button to share what she is doing with others...I have had to put it on the sidebar because for the life of me I cannot figure out how to put it here....I know, seriously computer challenged!

Thank you, Kelly, for your support. We are so thankful to the Lord that He chose you to be His instrument to help us bring Hailee home.

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Oops, I need to bring a little clarification to a wee error I made in my post yesterday.

Where I come from, well, we use some words that Americans would have no idea what they meant. Seriously, South Africans almost have an English language all of their own. So, when I write here, I make an effort to remind myself to use words that you all understand--oh, and I try to spell the American way too, for the most part. But this morning I got an e-mail from a dear friend bringing my attention to a 'mistake' I had made. I totally laughed...

I wrote this...We're pressing in and pressing on. Like a race horse running around the track, we have our blinkers on, and we are NOT being distracted by the things that could cause discouragement and doubt.

What in the world are 'blinkers'???? Um, well, those are what we, down in the Southern Hemisphere, call those little thingymajiggys that go on the sides of race horse's eyes. Aaahh---'blinders' I am told!

So, for those of you who were confused--now you know! And you just learned a South African word :)

as for me and my house......

I am so fired up--so downright mad tonight. Truth is, I hardly ever feel this way. But today I have had enough!

When Anthony and I set out to adopt our first special needs daughter four years ago, we already had three sons. Phew, some thought we had a big family already. But still, the response we got was nothing but love and support. Most thought our family was now complete...yea, the Salems finally had their daughter. Not. Then the Lord led us to Haven. Were we looking to adopt another special-needs child? Nope. But our Father in heaven clearly had different plans. For the most part, family and friends once again supported our mission.

But this time--oh how different things are turning out to be. This time it seems that we have taken things just a tad too far for some! It seems that, for some, we have crossed over from being a family who was led by the Lord, to being a family who no longer hears from God and has taken things completely into their own hands. This time it seems that we have completely lost the plot...and some are letting us know exactly how they feel. Down Syndrome? Are we sure about that? How in the world are we going to afford to feed another child? Can we handle this? Do we know that she will be dependent on us for the rest of our lives? Do we know that she may die once she is home? What about the other children in our home? Bla bla bla!

Honestly? We've had it! The experiences we have had from the last week have left me feeling physically sick. Something is seriously wrong when the most support we get is on my blog--from people whom we do not even know personally--people who just understand God's heart for adoption.

I have often heard stories of adoptive families coming up against opposition from family and friends when they stepped out in faith to adopt a child. I always counted my blessings that we never really experienced that. Until now. Now I understand.

Hailee is a child. A beautiful child. No different from any other child in the world. She is fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God. Like any other child, God's plans and purposes for her are to prosper her in every area of her life. Will His plans for her be the same as my other children? Absolutely not. They will be different--her own destiny, however that may look.

What right do I have to surrender my whole life to the Lord, to serve Him with everything that is within me--only to tell Him what I can and cannot handle in this life? Does He not know that already? "Um, sure Lord, I can adopt another child, but I can only handle this or that special need." Huh? Is that really surrender? What if my own biological child was born with Down Syndrome? Would I go crying to the Lord, "This is too hard, Lord. I just can't do it; it is way too hard!" No way. I'd love that baby like there was no tomorrow--being assured of the knowledge that my God does everything WELL. And if He chose to BLESS us with a biological child who had a seriously medical condition, so be it, we would accept His precious gift and love him or her just as equally as our healthy children. No questions asked.

So, what in the world is the difference with adopting a Down Syndrome child? The Almighty has chosen to bless us with this gift (and she IS a gift). I absolutely love how the Message Bible translates Psalm 127:5..."Don't you see that children are God's BEST GIFTS? That's right--His best gifts! No matter what is wrong with them--all children are His best gifts.

"But Anthony and Adeye--you can't adopt them all." Well, duh! We know that. "Why don't you go out on the mission field and just start an orphanage?" Well, guess what, we are--it's called the Salem home. And besides, orphanages definitely have their place--ONLY because the Christians are not taking up their mandate and caring for the orphans as they are commanded to. Yes, orphanages have their place, but they are certainly not Christ's ultimate heart for ideal orphan care. Loving homes are. I mean seriously, have you ever met an adult who aged out of an orphanage and heard him or her say, "Yeah, I tell you, I absolutely loved living in that orphanage. I never, ever wanted a family of my own." Not me.

In my Bible it does not say if you are called, or if you feel like it, or if you have enough money in the bank, or if you only have two children...no, my Bible commands us to take care of the widows and the orphans. Period! No excuses.

So, here we are. Counting the cost, really. Some who are close to us think we're nuts...when all we long for is for them to embrace our new daughter as part of the family. But you know what? It really is okay--because ALL our affirmation comes from the ONE who is sending us. It's okay when the naysayers have their little say...because when you walk so closely with the Father you can hear that still small voice speaking words of confirmation to your heart, and you know that you are right in the center of His will for your life. And that, sweet friends, is all that really matters in this life. Being obedient.

We're pressing in and pressing on. Like a race horse running around the track, we have our blinkers on, and we are NOT being distracted by the things that could cause discouragement and doubt. We will NOT let the enemy have any foothold here. Hailee is our precious sixth child--loved and treasured already as if she were flesh of our flesh.

But as for me and my household, we WILL serve the Lord (with reckless abandon!)
Joshua 24:15

haven makes some noise

So many people ask us if Haven has a voice. That's a legitimate question when you have a child who does not speak. The answer is yes, she absolutely does have vocal cords--and sometimes, every now and then, she loves to use them. Not often at all, just when she wants to. It is music to our ears when we can get her to imitate us. Some days she will try, other days not. Some days the words she imitates will sound similar to what we tell her to say, other days they sound nothing like it. It is so hit and miss.

But, the good news is that she does have vocal cords and she can imitate us when she wants to. It's all positive and every little bit of willingness Haven shows us in trying to make the words come out gives us such hope that someday she WILL be speaking.

Here is Haven having the best time with her brother and sister. Funny--the times we can get her to make the most noise is when she sees herself in front of a mirror. I think she was seriously mirror-deprived in the orphanage. Now, every opportunity she gets she strikes a quick pose. And she loves to dance--the girl can move her hips and definitely has natural rhythm.



Sorry--the video is a little fuzzy--too many little hands around here touch the lens.

I watch this video and see such HOPE in my daughter. How could it be that she was left in China by her first family, simply because she did not speak? In just nine months she has come so far, learned so many new things. Yes, she does not speak voluntarily--but look at the amazing potential in this child! ALL things are possible with God. All things.

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We were so blessed to have Amanda make a blog button for Hailee's adoption. I have put it on the left hand sidebar. Such a blessing. If you click on the button, it takes you straight to our sponsorship page with Reeces Rainbow--they are the amazing ministry we found Hailee through. I am also going to leave the chip-in up. So, donations to Hailee's adoption can be made either way. Please feel free to grab the button and post it on your own blogs. We would be so grateful if you could help us spread the word. Thank you, precious friends.

Hailee

I have received so many e-mails and comments from bloggy friends asking me what happened to the chip-in. Sorry--I actually took it down. I put the first one on my blog to try and raise the initial $1000 that we needed just to begin the process to bring Hailee home. Praise the Lord, we paid that! Now we just need to trust the Father for the remaining $20 000.00. A crazy figure...but so easy for my God. So, I have put the chip-in back up. We will probably leave it there and adjust the total as we raise money from different fund raising events. Watch and be amazed at what God will do.

I am so deeply touched by your support and encouragement. Seriously. Thank you to all of you who have committed to praying for Hailee as she waits for us. We are obviously deeply concerned about her. I wanted to share with you all another [very little] picture that I received of our sweet, very tiny little angel. My hearts breaks. She looks so frail, so weak. We know that it is only by the grace of God that she is even alive. At four years old she weighs just 15 pounds and cannot even sit on her own. It all seems so very wrong to me.

How I long to hold her in my arms and never let her go.



Anthony and I are preparing ourselves for the fact that there may be more going on with Hailee than just Down Syndrome. Some have mentioned the possibility of Cerebral Palsy. It's possible. Anything is possible at this stage. All we have is a one line medical report. That's it. It says nothing other than the fact that she cannot sit on her own and is extremely delayed.

Does it concern us that there may be more wrong with her? Heavens no! We truly do not care. She is a child who deserves a family, and if the Almighty Father, the Everlasting God believes that we can parent her, then forward we go. Whatever the future holds, we know it will be good...because our God is a good God! Hailee's condition is just a big whatever for us. Being obedient to bring her home is the only thing that truly matters. The rest is not our concern.

I have so much on my heart, so many things stirring in me. I'll share soon. Please know that we love you and are so thankful that the Lord chose to cross our paths with each and every one of you. You have been more of a blessing to us than you will ever know. Thank you for standing with us as we journey to bring precious Hailee home.

so incredibly blessed

How blessed we feel! There are no words to describe the gratitude that Anthony and I are feeling. The outpouring of love and support we have received from so many of you about Hailee's adoption is overwhelming. Your sweet comments totally blessed us. We have received a few mixed reactions, some are unsure of our decision to bring Hailee home (to them I say...take that up with the Almighty!). But you guys totally rock--you blessed us so much. We want you to know that we are so absolutely grateful that so many of you took time to encourage us, donate to our chip-in and post our story on your own blogs. How we love the Body of Christ.

Thank you bloggy friends!

What a busy time the last few days have been. Paperwork and more paperwork! Many of you know the story. Our Social Worker (who did our home study for Haven's adoption) has been amazing. She is trying to get away with just doing an update on our old home study. That will speed things up significantly. And, she has been so touched by Hailee's story that she is doing the home study for free! What usually costs $4000 (completely insane!) here in Colorado, is costing us nothing. How great is our God? How amazing are His ways? We take a step of obedience only to find that He has already gone before us and is paving the way for us to bring our new daughter home.

I am speechless at His amazing love for orphans. I tell you, He DOES move mountains to bring them home. There is no mountain, no obstacle that He cannot move to bring His precious children home.

Sure, I have moments when I wonder how in the world we are going to raise such a huge sum of money in such a short time. But the thoughts are fleeting. Because then I remember all He has done and all He promises He is yet to do. Then I remember that my Redeemer is so faithful...so awesome!

In the middle of crazy busy times with our paperwork, we've had time to spend precious family moments together. Like at a wedding last weekend when Anthony married sweet friends of ours. So much fun--especially when he asked the groom, "Ricki, do you take Jeni to be your lawful husband?" I just about died laughing (as did everyone else)--mainly because I know that my hubby can be such a goof, and I adore him that way.

So, when the kids are all dressed up--even if it only lasts for a few minutes before shoes are removed, or a spill happens, or hair falls out (of pony tails, that is), or shirts get unbuttoned, or food gets messed on a white shirt--we take pictures, just because it is a rare moment when all the kids look kinda decent.

I love these pics of my boys--how blessed I am that they are mine. Oh the little guy--can you tell that he is the one who is always up to mischief? Yes, he's the ONE!





Little miss Haven. I love how small she looks in her pretty little red dress, surrounded by beauty.



A smile that melts Daddy's heart every time. I bought a few of these Chinese dresses when we were in China 3 and a half years ago. I so wish I had bought more, they were cheap and are so adorable.



Thank you again, precious friends. We are so richly blessed. Thank you for your support, your encouragement and your prayers as we journey to bring Hailee home. Another little heart has found a home--yayee Jesus!

here we are...send us!

Oh my goodness--where do I even begin with this?

About a month ago I blogged here about an urgent situation two little girls were in. My heart broke. Being involved in the adoption community is such a blessing. Seeing little ones united with their families is such a joy to see. But, I also see those who wait. That's hard. Sometimes God allows children to cross my path so that I can pray for them, and for their families to find them.

But this time something was different. Yes, I absolutely felt called to pray. But there was more, and we just were not quite sure what our role was or what God expected from us. Until now.

After weeks of praying and seeking the Father, we have heard the call. We have heard the still, small voice of the Lord saying, "This is the way...walk in it". Precious friends, God is sending us on a new adventure, a mission to rescue one of His precious children in need.

The first time I laid eyes on her my heart almost stopped. Was I looking at the right child? Was she really four years old? She looked more like an infant. I inquired and got my answer--she was indeed four! How could it be? How can a four year old weigh only 15 pounds? She lies in a crib all day long and cannot even sit on her own. She is extremely delayed. She is a virtual baby. This precious little angel is one of the Father's special little blessings--she is fearfully and wonderfully made, with Down Syndrome.

She will soon be known as Hailee--"heroine"--because she will overcome many obstacles. She will be victorious!

Precious friends, we would so appreciate your prayers as we journey to bring Hailee home. We are facing a few potential obstacles. She is living in an area in Eastern Europe where a new policy for orphans has been put in place. The locals are strongly advised to foster the children. Normally a good thing, but not here. As an incentive to foster, huge financial rewards are given. The result--local people are going into the orphanages (much like we would go to a shelter looking for a new dog), and just taking the kids out. No home study, no background checks. Nothing. Unfortunately the money is not being used on the children, but on other things. The consequence? Frail and weak children are literally not surviving.

Here's the thing we're up against--at any time during the paperchase, and right up until the day we get there, a local family has the right to come and take Hailee away. We have no protection at all. Local families are always given priority. We could loose her any day. Once she is taken into foster care, she can never be adopted internationally again. She will be lost forever.

Should Hailee be taken into foster care, her chances of survival are very slim. She is too weak, too malnourished to survive it. If there is any further neglect, she will surely die. She is living on borrowed time as it is.

We are trusting that the angels of the Lord would protect her and keep her safe until we get there. We need to pray that NO FAMILY comes to take her away. That the Lord would protect her and shelter her in that place until the day that she will be ours.

Here is the one and only picture we have of our newest blessing from the Lord. Isn't she just precious?




This is a huge leap of faith for our family. This is us stepping out of our comfortable little boat and trusting the Father to meet us on the water, no matter how stormy it may become. Afraid? yeah, a little. This is a new journey. New adventures are always a little scary. We know nothing about parenting a child with Down Syndrome. But, we do know that when God says "Go", He provides everything we will ever need to be successful. That does not mean it will always be easy. But, it does mean the Almighty will never withdraw His hand.

The brainstorming has begun. How to raise $24 000.00 in just a few short months. The process will be quick. Hailee will be home before the end of the year. We're a one income family who lives dollar for dollar. God has never, not once, ever let us down. He has been so faithful and so amazing. We know He will provide for us to bring Hailee home. We know He has already gone before us.

Some say we're crazy. Some say we have completely lost it. Maybe we have, I don't know and I really don't care. Our lives are completely and utterly about surrender, absolute abandonment! How can I ever say, "Here I am, Lord, send me"...and not mean it with all my heart.

We prayed it, and God knew we meant it. So, here we go again.

He IS a good God

The last few days have been a few of those days! The kind of days when I forget.

When the mountains before me seem so huge, and my faith just feels so small...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When the cares and concerns in my heart feel like they will consume me...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When the road ahead looks like it is filled with too many bumps, so much more than I can handle...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When my heart is aching to be with the ones I love so far away...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When I wonder if God will ever come through for me...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When I close my eyes and see dreams and desires that I wonder if He will fulfill...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When the stress of trying to sell our home takes over every fiber of my being...

I forget that my God is a good God.

When my heart is broken in two for a little one who will surely die if she is not adopted..

I forget that my God is a good God.


How forgetful I can be. I have taken my eyes off the ONE who knows every care, every concern and every burden in my heart. Today I am reminded [once again] that He IS a good God. His Word reminds me of the signs and wonders He performed. The miracles He performed for His chosen people over and over again. Is He not the same yesterday, today and forever? Is He not able to carry every burden in my life, every care that weighs me down? Is He not the Almighty Father, the everlasting God?

He was, is, and always will be a good God. He never changes, He stays the same--a good God. My faithful Jesus.

Forgive me, Father, for my doubt and unbelief. Forgive me for having little faith, when I KNOW that you are good. You have never let me down--ever. Draw me nearer so that I may never, ever forget.


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**** Our God--He IS in the business of miracles. Thank you so much for praying for Dw after my previous post. God did an amazing thing. Overnight Dwight's liver numbers came down (after being told just yesterday that he would be in the hospital for several days), and he was discharged from hospital today. As I type, Linny is driving him home. Yes, indeed--miracles for today.

The Saunders

Precious friends,

I know many of you know Linny, and follow her blog. If you don't know her, or have not see her recent updates--their family really needs our prayers right now. Dw is very sick in the hospital. It looks like he has some kind of Hepatitis. Having done much research over the years, as my own two daughters have it, I know that when one gets it later in life, the liver is very affected. It is nasty!

This has been such an awful year for this amazing family. They so desperately need our love and our prayers. Would you pray with me?

This is one of the things I LOVE about blog world--the ability to send out prayer requests and know that the saints are praying is just amazing.

Time to pray for the Saunders. May they see victory in every area of their lives!